


Greystone Forest

by LostCommander13



Category: Original Work
Genre: Gay, M/M, Mystery, Original Fiction, Romance, Superstition, originalcharacters - Freeform, somefantasyelements
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-11
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-06-09 02:13:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15257160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostCommander13/pseuds/LostCommander13
Summary: No one in Tremont has a reason to go into Greystone Forest. Except for Briar.Where everyone else in town sees a dense forest that lacks big game to hunt, he finds solace.Greystone is his escape.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Kayden loves Briar.He doesn't think Briar's a curse.But it's impossible for them to be in a relationship.Greystone is his prison.





	1. Briar

**_Chapter 1: Briar_ **

Someone grabs my bag and yanks me back just as I walk out of school.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

I don’t say anything or make a sound when Brendan shoves me into the wall.

“Give me your assignment from Harrison’s class.”

I can’t look him in the eyes. He doesn’t want me to make eye contact anyway. “I… I turned it in second period,” I admit softly.

Brendan sighs like he’s disappointed. “Why would you do a stupid thing like that, cockroach? Now I have to hurt you.”

A barely audible gasp escapes me when Brendan punches me in the stomach. I double over, holding my stomach. Even with the handful of people that are still hanging around school an hour after classes ended, no one’s going to help me. They don’t care enough. Brendan kicks me, and I cry out for the first time.

“I warned you about doing things without checking with me first. You caused this.”

I grit my teeth against the pain from the hits, knowing it’s better to just let Brendan get it out of his system than to fight back. Not that I can stop Brendan anyway. When he stops hitting me, he even kicks my bag into the mud beside the pathway.

When Brendan walks away, I get up and grab my bag. I have to grab one of my books out of the mud. I sigh and wipe as much mud as I can off of the book before I start walking home.

I want to just head straight into Greystone Forest. Maybe go for a swim and relax. But Mom has a ‘guest’ coming over tonight, so I have to clean the house.

Mom is chasing a cat with a broom when I walk in. The cat hisses and jumps at me.

“Boy, don’t tell me you’ve been feeding damn stray cats again.”

I don’t say anything, just gently rub Zena’s head.

“It’s attached to you already. You know what you have to do with it now.”

“She’s not hurting anyone,” I protest. “Can I keep a pet, just this once?”

Mom shakes her head and puts the broom away. “Get rid of it or I’ll do it for you.”

I sigh and hug Zena closer. As much as I hate it, it will be worse for her if Mom handles it. “Okay… I’ll take care of it after I clean the house.”

Mom nods and walks down the hall to her room. I sit Zena down and start picking up the random things littering the living room floor. There are three pictures of her and Dad on the floor, one of them in a frame with cracked glass.

“Make sure you put those away!” Mom shouts.

I want to say something. Tell her off for cheating on Dad. Again. But I can’t. I just carry the pictures into my room, which is not much of a room. All that’s in it is a bed and a trunk for my clothes. I put the pictures under a jacket in my trunk.

Zena meows and hops onto my bed.

Just thinking about what I’ll need to do hurts. I don’t want to take Zena into the forest and I don’t want to kill her. Or give her to the ‘shelter.’ Zena’s blind in one eye, and a black cat. With almost everyone in town being superstitious… I’m scared for her.

I pet her for a few minutes before I leave her in my room to go clean the kitchen. I’m stacking dishes when a sharp pain on my hand makes me flinch and drop a plate.

Mom’s standing there, holding her wooden spoon. My hand stings from the impact the utensil made. “What have I told you, boy?”

“...Not to use my left hand dominantly,” I answer, rubbing the back of my hand. “But nobody can see me.”

“I don’t give a shit. You _will_ use your right hand like everyone else in this town. Do you understand?”

I refuse to answer, just put the stacked dishes in the cabinet. Until Mom grabs my arm, her nails digging into my skin.

“Do. You. Understand?”

I gasp quietly. “Yes… yes. I understand. I’ll use my right hand.”

She lets go, giving me one more glare before walking off again. I finish doing the dishes, clean up the dropped one, and start mopping the floor. My leg hurts from Brendan kicking me. It takes almost an hour and a half to finish mopping. By the time I’m done, it’s nearly five thirty. Going to Greystone this late is probably not a good idea.

But I have to. Greystone Forest is the only place where I don’t feel like I’m suffocating. I walk into my room and make sure Mom’s not going to see before I pull up the loose floorboard to get my personal bag.

I put the floorboard back and pick up Zena then creep out the back door so Mom won’t notice me leaving. I have to retreat a few steps when I see Mom’s guest at the door. I don’t like Markus. He scares me, if I’m being honest.

I wait until he goes inside before running towards Greystone. The further I get from town, the better I feel. Zena stays safe in my bag during the entire hour it takes to get there.

When I finally splash through the brook marking the entrance to the forest, I start running faster and don’t stop until I get to the pond. I set my bag down an okay distance from the water so Zena can explore and pull my shirt off.

I don’t wait afterwards; I run and jump in the water, enjoying the peace as the water envelops me. When I surface, I relax on my back and float for a bit.

After about ten minutes of relaxing, I dive again, smiling at the fish swimming through the water. They’re all so beautiful and watching them swim is calming. I surface again and take a deep breath, about to dive again, but then I notice Zena mewing at nothing and pacing around.

“Zena? What is it?”

She meows at me and goes back to pacing.

I shrug it off and dive. Cats are weird anyway. Maybe she’s focusing on a bug or something.

I swim for what feels like an hour, just listening to the animals running around.

A gunshot shatters the silence and I yelp and dive underwater. There’s not another shot, so I surface cautiously. _A hunter?_ People don’t normally go to Greystone; they usually hunt in the woods on the other side of town.

Zena’s gone, probably  spooked by the gunshot. I get out of the pond and pick up my things, taking my flashlight out of my bag. I have to find Zena.

“Zena!” I’m hoping that whoever’s in the woods will refrain from firing towards my voice. “Zena!” Despite the four years that I’ve been exploring this forest, I find myself walking through an area I’ve never gone to before, following Zena’s pawprints. “Zena!”

Another gunshot makes me jump. It’s not terribly close to me, but it’s just so out of place. There isn’t even a lot of big game in these woods.

_Maybe they’re after the coyote that keeps stalking the Sanders’s farm?_ “Zena!”

I find Zena hiding in a hollow stump and pick her up. She’s hissing at something, but I can’t tell what. I start shivering as the Sun sets and the temperature starts dropping, but I’m dry enough to pull my shirt on.

I tuck Zena into my bag and start towards home. I take a minute to look around the new area of the woods. I’ve never gone this deep into the woods, though I’m not entirely sure why I haven’t.

When I turn,I see the shadow of something strange hanging from a tree. I frown and walk over to grab it. Well, I try to grab it. It looks like it’s been here for years; long enough for the tree branch to have grown around it.

It’s an old necklace with some kind of pendant dangling from it. There’s too much mud and grime for me to tell what the pendant is, but I pull on it a few times and the old chain breaks. The pendant is surprisingly heavy.

“What are those sounds?”

One of the noises seems like footsteps, probably from the hunter. But the other… It’s almost like a melodic humming. I can’t tell where it’s coming from. I put the pendant in my pocket.

“What the hell are you doing here, Delaney?”

“My… my cat got out,” I respond softly.

Cason glances at where Zena’s peeking out of my bag. I do my best not to look at the dead coyote he has over his shoulder. I hate killing animal unless it’s completely necessary.

“You just love bringing bad luck to the rest of us, don’t you?”

I don’t answer him. “How is Serenity? She wasn’t at school today.”

“She spent the day at home. Woke up with the flu after your study session yesterday.”

_And he thinks it’s my fault._ “Well… tell her I hope she’s better soon.”

Cason pretty much ignores me, just mutters something about the curse then walks off, following more of a path than I used getting here.

Zena mewls until I take her out of my bag and hold her.

Halfway home, I feel like someone’s watching me. It’s getting colder out, and I start shivering again.

“H-Hello? Cason?”

Nothing. I can still hear the faint humming from somewhere. I sigh and shake my head before I continue walking. My flashlight flickers a few times.

“I put batteries in this thing like three days ago, and I haven’t used it since.”

It stops flickering as soon as I say that, and I shrug it off. I don’t get home until almost half past nine. I almost get into the house without being noticed, but the squeaky hinges on the door give me away.

“Bring me a beer!”

_So close._ I think about bolting to my room, but there are two problems with that. My door doesn’t have a lock on it and Markus already doesn’t like me. I don’t want to piss him off. I grab a beer out of the fridge and carry it to him. By the empty bottles and cans on the table and floor, both Mom and Markus have already gotten drunk.

“Took you long enough.”

He snatches the beer out of my hand. Mom isn’t acknowledging my presence, instead focusing on the TV. I rush to my room as soon as I can. I struggle trying to shove my chest in front of my bedroom door, but I feel much better once it’s in place.

I sit down on my bed and sit Zena on the floor before I get my tools out of my bag to start cleaning off the pendant. The humming hasn’t changed at all.

I wipe most of the mud off of it, then take the small pick to clean out the grooves in the outer piece of the pendant. After I get all the grooves cleaned out, I start polishing the gem set in the center. I think it’s an emerald, set in an engraved piece of silver.

As long as Mom doesn’t find it, I can give it to Dad when he comes home from his treatment. Dad _loves_ gemstones, but he hasn’t been able to go looking for them since he got sick.

“Mom’s going to be mad in the morning,” I tell Zena. When I’m completely finished with the pendant, I hide it under my pillow. “Especially if she finds out I kept you.” Zena hops onto the bed with me and starts walking on my chest, which makes me smile. “But I can’t get rid of you just because the people here think you’re bad luck.”

Zena hisses when I stand up and go to change into my pajamas. I crawl under my blanket and sigh as Zena lats down in the middle of my pillow.

“We’re not bad luck.”


	2. Kayden

**_Chapter 2: Kayden_ **

_ He’s looking at me. He’s actually looking at me! _

I know he can’t see me, but I don’t care. He’s standing so close to me. 

“H-Hello? Cason?” I love his voice so much.

His flashlight starts freaking out when I get closer to him. I can’t help but want to be closer to him really. His voice is lovely. I’ve always found it soothing.

I back away some when he starts wondering about the flashlight. I wish he would stay, even though it’s late. I follow him to the edge of the forest and watch as he heads towards the town. If only I could follow him.

At least now I have a name for him.

“Delaney.” The name sounds odd, but I like it. “Delaney.”

I end up wandering through the forest aimlessly, thinking about him. He’s been coming to the forest nearly every day for three years. Before I saw Delaney for the first time… everything seemed to run together.

He’s only been gone for a few minutes, but I already want him to come back. It doesn’t matter that he doesn’t know I’m here. Or that I can’t actually touch him or speak to him.

Yeah, being dead sucks.

I know we can never be together. Odds are that he’ll never become aware of my presence. 

But I still love him. 

I scare a few birds out of a tree then sit down underneath it. Delaney looked sad today. I hate it when he looks sad. I want to know why he was sad. I don’t want him to be sad.

He has a really pretty smile, and his whole face lights up when he smiles.

I don’t want him to be hurt, either. Sometimes he has bruises. And then there are the scars. I know it’s creepy, but I usually watch him swim, and I’ve seen the scars when he takes his shirt off. It makes me angry.

I’ve got two massive scars on my torso, but Delaney… He has a bunch of thin scars crisscrossing his back and chest. I want to know who hurt him and why. 

Delaney takes up most of my thoughts. Any thoughts not devoted to him were about how I died, which I honestly don’t remember.

Thinking about Delaney is much less depressing. 

His hair is always messed up in the best way. I would love to just run my hands through it. 

It’s so boring when Delaney’s gone.

 

Delaney scares me the next day. Out of nowhere, Delaney comes sprinting through the woods.

There’s a larger boy chasing after him.

“You fucking cockroach! Get your ass back here before I hurt you more!”

Delaney slips in the mud and crashes onto his back. “Brendan, I… I didn’t mean to. I’m s-sorry.” He sits up but doesn’t get to his feet, just scoots backward in the mud. 

“You’re actually stupid enough to hit  _ me _ ? What did I tell you about fighting back?”

I hate Brendan. I don’t know who he is, but Delaney looks  _ terrified _ , and I hate it.

Brendan kicks Delaney in his stomach when he doesn’t respond. If I could, I would drown Brendan for doing that. Delaney whimpers in pain.

“Fi-ighting back makes you angrier.”

Brendan sneers and grabs Delaney’s shirt collar, hauling him up without much effort. Delaney’s feet aren’t even touching the ground anymore.

I don’t know what to do. I want to help him, but I don’t know how.

“What? Did you think hitting me would make you something?”

Delaney stays silent other than the frightened whimpers.

“You’re never gonna be more than a curse on the town.”

“I-I’m not a cu-urse. N-nothing’s wrong with me.”

Brendan snickers and slams Delaney into the large tree behind them. I  _ hate _ the sound it makes when Delaney’s head hits the wood. And his cry… I never want to hear that sound again. He sounds so scared.

“Get away from him!” I yell before I realize neither of them can hear me.

“Pl-please-”

Brendan keeps Delaney pinned to the tree with one hand and wraps his free hand around Delaney’s throat. Then he wraps his other hand around Delaney’s throat, holding him off the ground like that instead.

“Br-Bren-endan-”

Brendan’s hold tightens. “If I killed you right now, I’d be doing the whole town a favor.”

“N-No.” Delaney kicks out and pries weakly at Brendan’s hands. There are tears in his eyes. “Ple-ease…” 

I may not know how exactly I was killed, but I do know I can’t let anyone be murdered, especially not Delaney.

I lose it when Delaney’s struggles slow then stop as his eyes fall shut. I lunge at Brendan before I can think. Brendan gasps as I pass through him and whirls around. Delaney’s limp body falls as Brendan lets go and looks around 

“What the hell?”

I concentrate as hard as I can, and one of the branches on the ground starts levitating, making Brendan jump a little. I’ve found I can do that, it just takes a lot of energy. Brendan kind of frightened but he still kicks Delaney once more before stalking off.

I kneel down next to Delaney. His chest is still rising and falling. Since leaving him here unconscious is not an option, I stay sitting beside him.

I’ve never been this close to him before. He has very faint freckles scattered across his face, and there’s a small, fading scar across his nose. He has extremely feminine eyelashes, but I find them beautiful.

His lips are slightly parted as he breathes and there are barely visible tear streaks going down his cheeks.

I can’t help it; I reach towards him. I let my hand hover over the side of his face, then pull my hand back. There’s a barely visible bruise on his cheek, and there are already red finger marks on his slender throat.

“Why did people hurt you?”

I have to scare away a wild cat that gets too close. It’s not the cat Delaney brought with him yesterday. I wouldn’t do anything to Zena. He’s not unconscious long.

His eyes flutter open. There’s a moment where they’re unfocused, and I just stare. His eyes are a lovely brown. Then his eyes focus.

On me.

“Hu-huh? Wh-where did you come from?”

_ He can see me? This can’t be real. _ But I answer anyway.  “I saw him chasing you and had to stop him.”

“You… you stopped Brendan?”

“I had to. I couldn’t let him hurt you.”

Delaney’s eyebrows draw together in the cutest way. “You… Why d-do you care?”

_ I’m actually talking to him. He can hear me.  _ “Why wouldn’t I care?”

Delaney sits up. “People don’t usually care. Or stand up to Brendan.” Then his eyes widen in concern. “Did he hurt you?” He reaches towards me, and I don’t move away. His hand passes through me. I’m guessing he’s too shaken up to notice that he can see through me as well. “Wh-what? You… M-my ha-and… You…”

His breathing speeds up a bit. I don’t want him to be scared of me.

“Wait… Please don’t freak out!”

Delaney shakes his head slowly. “I’m going crazy.”

“You’re not crazy.”

“My hand went  _ through _ you,” he argues. “Wh-what are you?” 

I hesitate, but I can’t stand seeing him so scared of me. He’s shuddering.

“I’m… I’m dead. I’m a ghost.”

Delaney blinks a few times. His lower lip starts to wobble, and his eyes well up with tears. “I… I ca-an s-see you…?” He sounds so vulnerable. Apparently, he cries when he’s scared or stressed. 

“Yeah, I don’t understand that anymore than you do. You haven’t been able to see me before.”

“Be-before?”

I nod. “I’m always around. I’m stuck in the forest, after all.”

“Ho-how did you stop Brendan if y-you ca-an’t t-touch him?”

“I’m not entirely sure. I mostly spooked him by making a branch float.”

He’s still trembling, but there aren’t any tears falling. “So… D-do you ha-ave a name?”

“My name’s Kayden.”

He nods slowly and bites his lip before mumbling, “I’m Briar.”

_ Delaney must be his last name, then.  _ “I like that name.”

Briar sniffles and wipes his nose on his sweater sleeve. “Tha-ank you… for sa-avng me.”

“You’re welcome, Briar.” The name sounds better than Delaney. Briar suits him better. “Are you okay?”

Briar pulls his knees to his chest and kind of curls in on himself, staring at his untied boots. His feet are pointed towards each other a little, in a very adorable way. He rubs harshly at his eyes, almost like he’s ashamed by the tears.

“Crying is okay, you know?”

“I’m too old to… to cry as mu-uch as I do. And I’m a b-boy… I’m pathetic.”

“You’re not pathetic, Briar.”

“H-how would you kno-ow?”

I probably shouldn’t tell him that I’ve been watching him for years. I don’t want to scare him again. I don’t realize I’m staring until…

“Kayden?”

_ He said my name. Holy shit he said my name. _

“H-how do you kn-know, Kayden?”

I don’t know what to say to him. Turns out, I don’t have to say anything. Briar gasps and scrambles to his feet.

“Break en-ended li-ike twenty min-inutes ago… I ha-ave to go to school.” He turns to run.

“Briar!” Briar stops and looks back at me, so I continue, “You will be coming back, right? I didn’t ruin the forest for you?”

“I… I ne-eed this forest, gho-ost or not.”

He runs off without saying anything else. I don’t follow him to the forest’s edge today, not if he can see me. 

“See you soon, Briar.”


	3. Briar

**_Chapter 3: Briar_ **

_ It had to be a hallucination or something… It couldn’t have been  _ real _.  _ I flinch as an eraser is thrown my way. It’s not thrown very hard, but a few classmates snicker when I jump. I sigh quietly and slouch further into my seat.

Mr. Harrison glances at me as he tells the others to be quiet, so I give him a tiny smile. He’s only lived in Tremont for a year, so he’s not crazy superstitious like everyone else. He was one of Dad’s friends, actually. He’d even gone easy on me for being late once he saw the marks Brendan left.

He nods and turns back to the slideshow on the board.

_ If it wasn’t, then what stopped Brendan? _ It hadn’t been the first time Brendan had choked me, but it had been the first time I was actually scared he’d kill me. Usually, it’s just him making a point that he  _ can _ kill me if he wants to, but he’s ‘being nice.’

I glance at Brendan, and, thankfully, he’s not looking at me, too distracted by his phone. Thinking about what happened makes my head hurt, so I turn my attention to the assignment. I’ve already finished all but one question.

I hate writing with my non-dominant hand; it makes my handwriting harder to read. But I don’t have a choice. When the bell rings, I stay seated until everyone else rushes out, chatting with each other. At least I  _ always _ get to sit with about a foot and a half between me and anyone else.

“Briar?”

I look up from putting my books. “Yes?”

“You did incredibly well on the last assignment,” Mr. Harrison says. “You’re really enjoying this class, aren’t you?”

I nod. “I love history, in general.” I know he really wants to ask about the new bruising, but he knows I don’t like attention being drawn to any bruises. “I’m okay, Mr. Harrison.”

“Brendan chased you off campus, Briar. He’s getting more aggressive, and honestly? I’m worried.” I fall silent and twist the hem of my shirt a few times. “How are things at home?”

I’ve thought about telling him about Mom cheating on Dad, but it feels like betraying my mother. Not speaking up feels like betraying my father, but I know he would forgive me. He understands.

“Mom… Mom drank last night.” That’s safe to admit. Most people know she’s a bit of an alcoholic.

“Are you okay?”

I nod, thankful that the handful of new cuts aren’t visible. “I left for school pretty early, so she didn’t really notice me.”

Mr. Harrison sees my notebook and the small green flag note I stuck onto today’s assignment. “That’s good. You can turn in today’s assignment now, if you’d like?”

I hold the notebook closer, shaking my head. “I… I can’t. Brendan… Brendan will hurt me.”

“He can’t get away with…” Mr. Harrison trails off and shakes his head. “He shouldn’t be allowed to do these things.”

“He doesn’t. Unless I’m the… the target.” There’s no point in lying. I’ve known for years that I wasn’t liked. “I should get going… Gotta cook dinner.”

“Look after yourself, okay?”

“Yes, Mr. Harrison.” I walk out of the class. Luckily, the students have already left, probably excited about the fireworks show that’s going on tonight.

I hate the annual festival. It’s always full of loud, pushy people that don’t like me. I’ve only gone twice, once with Dad before his relapse, and once with Serenity. Both times, I felt like I was ruining their fun, so I declined any more offers to go.

Odds are, I’ll be spending the next three days in Greystone. That leads to thoughts of Kayden. I’m still not entirely sure it was real.

Kayden… he changes everything.

Up until now, I’ve been able to convince myself that there’s nothing wrong with me, despite the ‘evidence’ everyone uses to claim I’m a curse.

But if I’m seeing a ghost, then there’s  _ definitely _ something wrong with me. I can’t avoid Greystone, though, whether Kayden’s real or just a figment of my imagination. I’ll really go insane if I have to stay in Tremont all the time.

I take a few steps towards Greystone before I realize I’m automatically heading there. I don’t want to go home. 

I don’t have a choice. Mom will be  _ livid _ if I don’t make dinner, and I’d rather avoid her anger if I can. Mom is watching TV when I get home.

Markus is here, too. 

“H-how was your day?” It’s hard to keep my voice steady, but I don’t think I’ll be able to handle her mocking me today. “Mom?”

“Did anyone speak to you?” Markus asks.

I shake my head, clutching the hem of my shirt in shaking hands.

“Then don’t speak until one of us addresses you. Go make dinner.” 

I nod, then he glares at me. “Yessir.” I hurry into the kitchen and put my bag on the counter before starting to search for ingredients. “They didn’t tell me what to make.”

Options are pretty slim, judging from what I have to work with. Spaghetti seems like a safe option. Plus, I can cook it fairly quickly at this point, so I can make myself a sandwich or two then hole up in my room or head to Greystone.

I’ve gotten very good at making spaghetti, so I just zone out while I cook.

If Kayden  _ is _ real, then… he stopped Brendan, somehow. He cared enough to stand up for me. The only person that had done that, other than Dad, was Serenity. But it made things worse, having a girl fight my battles. That didn’t bother me as much as hearing people taunt her about being in love with the curse.

She’s not romantically attracted to anyone, and I know it doesn’t really upset her, but… It’s my fault she gets teased at all.

I put out a plate for Mom and Markus, then dish the spaghetti onto them and pour them each a glass of soda before I throw together a couple ham and cheese sandwiches for myself and put them in a bag to take with me.

I wait until Mom acknowledges me to speak. “Dinner’s ready, Mom.”

As soon as they’re seated, I stop to grab Zena from my room and dash out the door. I make it out of town before it gets too crowded, though I do get a couple of insults hurled at me from the small crowd that’s gathered.

Someone even trips me. As much as I want to get to Greystone as soon as I can, I make a detour to stop by Serenity’s house. I slip around to the back of her house and climb the huge tree in her yard.

Once I’m seated on the branch that’s closest to her window, I knock on it.

“Briar?” Serenity’s smiling when she opens the window and leans on the sil. She looks paler than normal, and she doesn’t sound great, but I’m happy to see her. “Let me see her.”

“Huh?”

“The cat, Bri! Dad was ranting about it, and I want to see!”

I carefully pass Zena over to her, and Serenity smiles while cuddling Zena. “I found her outside school.”

“She’s so cute.” Serenity passes Zena back after a few minutes, and I let Zena hide in my bag. “Briar… What’s that on your neck?” I look away from her, and Serenity sighs heavily. “Brendan or your mom?”

“... Brendan.”

“Your mom hurt you too, didn’t she?” I don’t respond, and she crosses her arms. “Briar-”

“I know, okay? It’s a messed up situation, but there’s nothing I can do about it.” Serenity blinks at my little outburst, and I wrap my arms around myself. I can already feel guilty tears welling up in my eyes. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, Briar. You’ve got nothing to apologize for. You heading to Greystone?” I nod, and she goes on. “Aren’t you going to watch the fireworks? We can hide on the roof again.”

“I’m good. I can see them from the edge of the forest. Enjoy the festival.”

“If you’re sure you don’t want to stay.”

I climb down after she closes the window, then continue on to Greystone.  _ It was real, then. _ Kayden’s sitting down by a tree not far from the natural forest border. I stop on my side of the brook until he notices me and stands.

“You came back!”

His voice has this odd, subtle crackling effect to it. Not enough to distort the words, but still noticeable.

“You’re… you’re real? And actually… a… a… ghost?”

I don’t know why I bother asking. He’s translucent.

“Yeah. I’m glad you came back, Briar.”

I take a deep breath and cross into the forest. I have to see it. “C-Can I…?”

Kayden nods and holds his arm out when I gesture towards it. As expected, my hand passes straight through his arm, leaving my hand feeling cold.

“Please don’t be afraid of me,” Kayden says when he sees me staring at my hand. “I can’t hurt you.” He reaches for my shoulder and smiles as his hand passes through me. Then he sees my bag, and Zena’s head poking out. “You brought Zena!”

“You… You know her name?”

“I heard you calling her the other day. And I kind of teased her while you were swimming,” he admits.

“That’s what she was meowing at,” I whisper, more to myself than him.

I jump in surprise as the first firework goes off, accidentally jumping right through Kayden.

He laughs at my startled face as I get my balance back and turn to watch the colors fade.

“I like watching the fireworks,” Kayden says. 

I sit down to eat my first sandwich and watch the fireworks. “It… it must get pretty boring here.”

“It does.” Kayden almost says something but stops and watches the next few fireworks. He’s hovering off the ground now, laying on his back in mid-air. “I’m really glad I didn’t ruin Greystone for you, Briar. I know how important it is to you.”

“You don’t know the half of it.” I don’t intend for him to hear me. The last thing I want is to burden anyone with my problems. 

“You look sad… I’ll leave you alone if you want me to. I can’t leave Greystone, but it’s a pretty big forest.”

I finish my first sandwich before I answer, smiling at Zena jumping onto and off of a stump. “No. No. You were here before me… I shouldn’t make you leave.”

“As long as it’s okay with you.”

“It’s okay.”

Kayden flips over and smiles at me. “You’re-”

Whatever he says next is drowned out by the loudest firework thus far. I get the feeling that it’s important, though I don’t know why. “What?”

“Oh… nothing.”

It doesn’t  _ seem _ like nothing, but I’d rather let it go than risk annoying Kayden by bothering him. Having someone here makes me feel less lonely, even if that person’s not physically here.

Maybe the whole seeing-a-ghost thing won’t be that bad?


	4. Kayden

**_Chapter 4: Kayden_ **

I like watching the reflections of the fireworks in Briar’s eyes. “You’re so beautiful, Briar.”

A particularly loud firework drowns out the words.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing.” I flip back over.

Briar falls asleep before the fireworks end. I wind up watching him instead of the remaining few fireworks. Yeah, it’s creepy, but I can’t help it. I’ve spent so long watching him from a distance. Being close to him is amazing.

Something does bother me, though. Briar doesn’t look peaceful, even when he’s sleeping, his eyebrows are drawn together, and he’s not very relaxed.

Zena lays down on his chest, making Briar relax ever so slightly.

But it will probably get colder for him the later it gets, and sleeping on the ground can’t be comfortable.

“Briar. Briar…” Two more tries yield no results, so I glide down towards him and take a chance on trying to wake him. I lay my hand on his shoulder, hoping the lower temperature will wake him up. That doesn’t work, so I touch his face instead. “Briar?”

Briar’s eyes fly open and he lets out a small shout, scrambling away from me a bit. “N-no!”

I float up a bit to give him space. “Briar, hey… you’re okay. It’s just me.”

He’s shaking, but I’m not sure if it’s because of the cold or because he’s scared of something. “K-Kayden? Wh-what… what’s… What?”

“You fell asleep. The fireworks ended a few minutes ago. I don’t want you getting sick from the cold tonight. Figured you should go home.”

Briar sits up and rubs his arms, staring at Zena, who’s moved to curl up on his lap. The wind is picking up, messing his hair up more than it already was. “I… I don’t want to. Mom… Mom’s gonna be…”

“What’s wrong?”

He shakes his head and refuses to look at me. “N-nothing’s wro-ong.”

I slowly come down and kneel in front of him. “Briar, you were scared when I woke you up. Something  _ is _ wrong.”

“What… what do you care?” He’s struggling to keep his voice steady. 

“I… I know things can’t be great for you, Briar. That Brendan bastard threatened to kill you. Talk to me.”

Briar shakes his head again. “No. I… I can’t.”

“Why are you scared to go home?”

He goes still, looking away as he cuddles Zena close. There are tears in his eyes, making his eyes shine in the moonlight. He just shakes his head. I hate the little whimpers he’s making.

“Briar, please, tell me what’s going on. It’s not like I can tell anyone else.”

“M-my mom… sh-she drinks… Wh-when she’s drunk, she… she hu-urts me b-badly.” He doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, and I don’t either. Briar carefully curls around Zena, hugging his knees tightly. “It’s… it’s no-ot impo-ortant.”

“Yes it is. It’s incredibly important.” Briar stays silent and curled up in his ball. As adorable as it is, I hate it. He’s so sad and scared. “I know somewhere you can stay.”

Briar doesn’t react.

“Briar, please. You’ll get sick. Trust me.”

“Wh-why do you ca-are?” Briar whispers, peeking up at me through his lashes. 

“Because I… I love you,” I admit before I can back out of it. “Come on, I can’t tell how cold it really is, but your fingers are turning blue. Please.” His lips are tinged with blue as well, but I don’t point that out to him.

Briar stands up hesitantly and stares at me. I just lead him further into the forest and to the cave.

“This way you’ll be out of the wind.”

Briar sits down, still watching me. “You… what?”

“I love you,” I repeat.

Briar pulls a threadbare sweater from his bag and tugs it on. It’s a couple sizes too big, and I think it was probably red at some point, but it’s faded into pink. “N-no you don’t. Yo-you’re a gho-ost… and I’m… I’m me.”

“That’s why I love you, Briar. Listen, we’ll talk about it in the morning. Get some sleep.”

Briar curls up in his ball again, this time drawing his knees and arms into the sweater. “B-but…”

“Briar, just rest.”

Briar somehow manages to shrink further in on himself. “S-so-orry…”

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’ll watch over you, keep animals away from you.”

Briar sticks one arm out of his sweater and lays down, folding his arm under his head. “Y-you don’t love me. You do-on’t know m-me.” He’s already half asleep again when he speaks. His sleepy voice is really cute, and he yawns halfway through the sentences.

I don’t say anything until he falls asleep. “You’d be surprised.”

I can’t understand it. How could his mother hurt him? I don’t understand how  _ anyone _ could hurt Briar. He’s always seemed so… Sweet.

It’s hard not to admire him while he sleeps. I’m still trying to wrap my head around being able to interact with him. It’s really hard not to get close to him, but I don’t want to make him colder.

“Mmm… No strawberries.”

I shake my head. He’s just  _ so  _ cute. The night passes uneventfully, other than Briar waking up in tears at some point, crying ‘it hurts.’ He ends up cuddling with Zena until sunrise, hovering on the edge of sleep. He’s got circles only just visible around his eyes.

“Good morning,” I tell him once he sits up. “Were you warm enough while you slept?”

Briar doesn’t answer immediately; he rubs his eyes and yawns, then fully curls up in his sweater, propping his chin on his knees. “I… It was kind of chilly, but it was fine… It could’ve been worse… It  _ has _ been worse.” Briar sighs sadly then goes on, “Thank you… for helping me.”

“You’re welcome, Briar.” I smile at him, hoping to help him relax. “I wish I could’ve helped more.” I can’t see his fingers, but at least his lips are back to their normal pale pink. 

“You… you already helped more than… than most people would.”

“You were showing signs of frostbite, Briar. I’m sure anyone would have-”

“They wouldn’t have.”

I move closer to him, sitting down a couple feet away. “What are you talking about? I mean, I know you said your mother hurts you when she’s drunk, but I’m sure people would help you.”

Briar doesn’t say anything. Zena curls up on top of his boots. 

“Briar, what did you mean when you said no one would help you?”

“They hate me,” Briar whispers.

I don’t respond for a few seconds. “What… Why would anyone hate you?”

“They… they think I’m a curse.”

I stare at him after he says that. Zena starts pawing at me, well, trying to, and she hisses when she can’t touch me. “Why do they think that?”

“They have ‘evidence’ to back it up. And my birthdate doesn’t help.”

He’s not happy, but at least he doesn’t look sad. And I might get to learn more about him. There was only so much I could learn over three years. “What’s your birthdate?”

“April 13, 2001.”

“What’s unlucky about that?”

Briar sighs. “It was a Friday.”

“So? That’s no reason for anyone to hate you.”

“Most of Tremont’s people are superstitious. My birthdate, plus their ‘proof,’ and…”

I cross my arms. “That’s not fair. What proof could they have?”

“A lot.”

“Are you going to tell me any of it, or not?” Briar bites his lip and looks away from me. “It’s okay if you don’t tell me. We can talk about something else, if you want?”

“Why did you say you… you love me?”

Yeah, I knew that was coming eventually. There are a lot of reasons why I love him, actually, but I doubt Briar likes that much attention, even if it’s positive. “Because it’s true, Briar. I love you.” I continue before he says anything, “I don’t expect you to love me back. It’s not like a relationship between us would work, ‘cause the whole… ‘I’m dead’ thing. And you probably like someone else anyway, but that won’t stop me from loving you.”

Briar stays quiet long enough for me to regret what I said. I almost apologize, too, before he finally speaks. “Maybe… maybe… Maybe we can be friends, at least?” Briar looks up at me, chewing on his lip until it bleeds a little. “I mean, um… Since I… I can see you, somehow… You wouldn’t be as lonely…”

It’s weird that he brings up me being lonely. I wasn’t lonely when I was alive; I’ve only been alone for a few years. It seems like Briar’s been pretty lonely his whole life. 

“I would love to be your friend, Briar.”

Briar gives me a tiny, barely there smile. It’s the first time he’s smiled at me. Ever.It’s beautiful, and I love that I can make him smile.

“Are you going home today?” I ask after a few minutes.

“I don’t want to, but I… I can’t really stay here without getting sick.”

“I know what you can do,” I tell him. “Do you have a sleeping bag, or just a big blanket?” Briar nods. “So bring it and a pillow. We can have a sleepover!”

Briar tilts his head. “A… a sleepover?”

“Yeah. Wait… you’ve never had a sleepover?” He shakes his head and averts his eyes. “That’s okay. This can be your first!” I move a little bit closer to him, mostly trying to figure out his boundaries. “Why didn’t you bring a blanket when you came here last night?”

“I  wanted to get out of town before the crowds got too massive, plus Mom was already kind of tipsy when I made dinner, so… I didn’t think about it. What else do I need to bring for a sleepover?”

“Anything you like to do. Games or whatever.”

Briar glances down at where Zena is clinging to his sweater then looks back up at me. “Can you play games?”

“I can move small things pretty well, so game pieces are okay.”

“I don’t have a lot of games... I’ve got an old Trouble game.”

I shrug. “Bring whatever you want, Briar. Whatever you want to do for fun.”

Briar stands up and puts his arms threw his sweater sleeve before tucking Zena into his bag. “I’ll be back soon.”

I want to walk him to the brook, but I don’t want to push him. “I’ll meet you at the brook, Briar.”

He gives me another of his small smiles before he walks out of the cave. I float through the top of the cave so I can watch him leave without freaking him out. Just being friends with him is more than I could’ve ever hoped for.

_ I’m going to make his first sleepover awesome. _


	5. Briar

**_Chapter 5: Briar_ **

I get at least a dozen glares from the people still milling around the games that are set up. At least Zena’s fully hidden in my bag. I keep my head down, trying to make myself look smaller.

I give up trying to make it past them when someone swings the mallet from the strength test game at me. I gasp and flinch away from it, and it just barely misses me. So I slip away and take the alleys instead. It will take longer, but it’s marginally safer for me.

_ Please be asleep. Please be asleep. _

The back door isn’t locked this time, so I open it as quietly as I can. I bolt for my room first. The humming’s back when I walk in my room, but it’s not too distracting. I grab the comforter off my bed and roll it up.

“It’s going to be easier to carry if I tie it.” I grab my belt off the ground and buckle it around my comforter. I stick my Trouble game in my bag.

The weird pendant gets knocked off of my bed when I grab my pillow, so I pick it up. The humming gets louder. I can’t leave it here and risk Mom finding it and selling it; I tuck it in my pocket. I take a chance and set my stuff outside the door, then go back into the kitchen after making sure Zena’s not all the way in my bag. I grab one of the paper bags and drop some fruit into it, along with a few granola bars I’ve been hiding in the back of the cabinet.

There are dishes piled up in the sink. I  _ know _ I shouldn’t stick around, but… I can’t stand that much of a mess. I wait for the water to heat up and start washing dishes. I haven’t heard Mom, so hopefully she’s sleeping off a hangover.

About a minute later, I’m shoved against the counter, and I drop a bowl in the sink at the shock of the impact.

“Fuckin’ curse.”

My heart pounds. If Mom’s bad drunk, Markus will be… unbearable. I don’t even  _ try _ to keep my voice steady as I turn and take a few tiny steps away from the sink. “I… I wa-as j-just l-leaving, I-”

Markus grabs my left arm. Even  _ drunk _ , he’s way stronger than me. It hurts.

“Ma-arkus… I w-wa-as le-eaving…”

Markus laughs. “Ya think I’m jus’ gonna let ya go? I heard whatcha did to Brendan. Ya should know fightin’ back is stupid.” He pulls me closer to the sink, and I see him glance at the still-running sink.

I try to pull away desperately. “No… M-Mark-”

Him holding my hand under the water is bearable, for the first couple seconds. Then the water starts to burn. 

I can’t help it; I scream for the first time in awhile. I’m having trouble breathing, between sobbing and yelling. I hate any kind of pain, but burns… Burns are the worst.

I don’t know how long Markus holds my hand under the hot water. It feels like hours. When he finally lets me go, I collapse on the spot and cradle my hand lightly, struggling to keep it away from my sweater’s fabric.

As much as I want to stop, I’m still crying. Markus snorts and walks away, leaving me on the floor. I stay here for a few minutes, unable to think about anything but the pain. When I finally grab my bag of snacks and walk outside, the pain has dulled to a throb. I can’t grab anything with my left hand without shouting. 

I put my bag of snacks in my other bag, then somehow manage to pick up my personal bag and my pillow. I take the alleys again on the way out of town, because I’m still crying and I just can’t handle anymore hate today.

Zena meows and rubs against my side. I’m glad I kept her; she  does make me feel just a little bit better I haven’t stopped crying when I get to the brook.

“Briar, are you ready for…” Kayden trails off when he notices me crying and rushes to the edge of the brook on his side. “What happened?”

I don’t answer him, instead crouching down by the brook after I drop my stuff so I can let the cool water run over my hand.

“Briar, what happened?” Kayden’s voice is gentle. Much gentler than anyone’s voice has been in awhile. “Talk to me, Briar.  _ Please _ .”

“M-Mar-arkus… bu-urned me.”

I pull my hand out of the water and cross the brook to stand beside Kayden. It feels a little safer within Greystone’s boundaries. I yelp when my hand brushes my shirt, and Kayden puts his hands over my burned one.

“What are you… Kayden?”

“It will help with the pain.”

The cold emanating from him  _ does _ help ease the sting. 

Kayden frowns at me. “I hate seeing you cry. You’re too beautiful to cry and be in so much pain.”

I keep my gaze on the ground. I know it’s a positive thing to say. But I still can’t make eye contact. Looking people in the eye usually angers them and leads to confrontation. I don’t like confrontation.

“Why don’t you ever look me in the eye?”

I shrug. Part of me wants to pull my hand away, but another part of me likes that Kayden cares enough to want to help the pain go away. He says he loves me, but even if he didn’t, it’s still incredibly sweet. And something I’m not used to.

“Briar, I actually  _ can’t _ hurt you.”

“You could if you tried. I’m… I’m weak.” It takes a second for me to realize that my voice isn’t shaking anymore. It’s weird.

Kayden shakes his head. “Why would I  _ want _ to hurt you?”

“Lots of people want to hurt me.”

“Well, I’m not like that.” Kayden takes his hands away. “Do you have anything to wrap it with?”

I nod and dig through my bag one-handed to get the gauze I always carry with me. I wrap my hand lightly then pick up my things. “Where do you want me to put this stuff?”

Kayden smiles and leads me to the cave I had stayed in last night. “In case it rains. Can’t have you getting sick,” Kayden explains.

After I’ve put down my blanket and pillow, and Zena’s chasing a butterfly around the cave, I set out Trouble. “I’m sorry. I didn’t bring much. This and some books.”

“Is that what you like to do for fun?” I nod, so Kayden grins and goes on, “Then that’s perfect. This is your first sleepover, I want you to love it.”

“Why?”

“That’s what friends are for.”

_Friends_. I’m not used to that either. Yes, Serenity is my friend, but she has other friends. She has _lots_ of friends. I’m just the, ‘Oh, my dad says not to hang out with you, so I’m doing it anyway. Kayden doesn’t have any. I feel guilty for thinking that; Kayden doesn’t have a choice about being lonely. I shouldn’t be trying to gain something from Kayden’s bad luck.

“I’m sorry…”

Kayden looks up from putting his game pieces in the start spaces. One of them falls back to the ground as his concentration is broken. “Sorry? For what?”

“For trying to gain something from your situation.”

“What?”

“You have no control over being trapped here. Alone. And I’m taking advantage of it so  _ I _ won’t be lonely. I’m not… I’m being selfish.”

“Briar, you’re not the only person that’s come into this forest. Yeah, you’re the only one that can see and hear me, but that’s not why I want to be your friend. I’m  _ choosing  _ to be your friend, Briar. You’re not taking advantage of me.”

I put all my pieces in my home spaces instead of responding. I still feel guilty, even with the assurances.

Kayden puts his last piece into start, shaking his head as he pushes the bubble. He doesn’t get a six, so he can’t move out of start. “Today and tonight, it’s all supposed to be about having fun. I want you to be happy, if only for a day or two.”

I do pop a six, so I move my first piece out and pop again. “I still don’t understand, Kayden. How can you be sure you love me when I’m the only person that can talk to you?” I can hear the humming in the forest now, unlike earlier.

“I’ve been in love with you since before this, Briar. I’ve been in love with you for almost two years now, I think.” Kayden pops a six, too, and moves out.

“How can you… how do you know I’m someone to love just from seeing me?”

“Well… There’s a lot of reasons, Briar.” He gets a six and a three on his turn.

On my next turn, I get a five, which will land me on Kayden’s green piece. But I hesitate. I don’t want to anger Kayden.

“Go ahead, Briar,” Kayden says, giving me an encouraging smile. “You’re sending me back to start fair and square.”

I put his piece back in start, leaving mine in its place. I’m used to people yelling, or slapping me, or just refusing to play. But Kayden seems… happy that I’ve bumped him back.

“Do you wanna play twenty questions?” Kayden asks.

“How… how do you play that?”

Kayden’s eyes widen. I haven’t really paid attention to it before, but his eyes are probably the darkest brown I’ve seen before. Not that I have a lot to compare them to, but still. “You’ve never played twenty questions?” He hasn’t rolled a six yet.

I shake my head as I move my piece. 

“That’s alright. It’s simple. We take turn asking each other questions until we each ask twenty.”

“What stops someone from lying?” I ask.

Kayden shrugs. “Trust. Want me to go first?” I nod and get my first piece into home. “Hmm… what’s your favorite color?”

“You’ll la-augh at me.”

“I won’t,” Kayden says. “Cross my heart and hope to d- Wait.”

I know I shouldn’t, but I find myself chuckling at his face. Kayden looks at me and I stop immediately and try to make myself smaller. He finally gets a piece out, just as I get my second piece home.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, Briar. I like your laugh. Anyway, favorite color?”

“Lavender and pink are my favorites. Is it my turn now?” Kayden nods, and I ask, “What’s  _ your _ favorite color?”

“Green. What do you want to be when you grow up?”

“I’m seventeen,” I argue.

“You know what I mean, Briar.”

I smile at him as he gets his piece into home. “An archaeologist.”

Kayden leans his head on his fist. “Really? Why?”

“I love history, plus I’ll get to travel all over the world. Go somewhere that I can  _ breathe _ . What about you? What did you want to be?”

Kayden glances up when Zena walks in and pounces on the game board, scattering our pieces. “Well then. We can play again later, we’ll call it in your favor, since you had three home and I only had one.”

“You… you’re saying  _ I _ won?”

Kayden nods and stands up. “Come on, we’ll keep playing twenty questions while we go have some fun.”

“Fun doing what?”

“We could play pretend.”

“Isn’t that for kids?”

Kayden shakes his head. “You have an imagination for a reason. C’mon, we can play Neverland! I’ll be Peter Pan.”

“You’ve read that book?” I ask, following him outside.

“Of course. Let’s go, lost boy!” Kayden does a pretty great imitation of Peter Pan’s cry from the movie and runs off, swinging his arm.

“You know, you’re surprisingly cheerful for a… a ghost. What are you doing?”

“Attacking pirates, duh! I need backup, too. I can’t take them all down with just one sword!”

I lift my arms after a few seconds, pretending to draw a bow. I glance at Kayden, and he nods, so I let go of the imaginary string.

“Good shot!”

I smile at him and ‘fire’ again I still feel a little ridiculous, but I haven’t played like this since before Dad relapsed when I was nine. 

“You know, you never told me what you wanted to be.”

“Oh. Oops. I wanted to be a Marine Biologist.”

I stop for a second. “Really? I wouldn’t have guessed that.”

“There’s a reason I’m kind of scrawny. I used to swim a lot, and I’ve always loved marine life. Especially jellyfish.”

Zena jumps through Kayden and meows when she lands, making Kayden smile widely and pretend to poke her with his imaginary sword.

Agreeing to this sleepover might be the best thing that’s happened in forever.

I jog to catch up with Kayden. I really don’t want to ruin anything, but I’m incredibly curious. “I know it’s not my turn, but… How… how did you die, Kayden?”


	6. Kayden

**_Chapter 6: Kayden_ **

When I  don’t answer right away, Briar looks away and bites his lip. I force myself not to stare with great difficulty. He just looks so adorable…  _ How can anyone hurt someone so sweet? _

“I’m sorry, K-Kayden.”

I give him a reassuring smile. “It’s alright. I got distracted, that’s all. Honestly, I don’t know exactly how I died. I know it hurt really bad, but I was only partially conscious and… Really out of it. Just a sudden, terrible pain, and then… Nothing. Next thing I know, I’m here.”

“That’s… that’s so  _ wrong _ , Kayden!”

I find myself staring at him again. I haven’t heard him sound that… forceful about  _ anything _ , really. “I know it’s not the best thing ever.”

“It’s not fair.”

“Neither is your situation,” I point out.

Briar absently touches the scar peeking out of his shirt collar and the bruise ringing his eye. “I… It’s… it’s different.”

“How, Briar? How is it any different? You’re getting threatened and abused simply because you exist!”

I don’t realize how loud my voice is until I notice that Briar is shrinking away from me, hugging himself.

“Briar, hey… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you. Hey, no, don’t… don’t be afraid of me. You’re not scared, right?” Briar blinks at me a few times and shakes his head slowly. “But you have to admit that it’s not fair for either of us. A bad person happened to cross paths with me, and I ended up dead. But you… you… I just don’t understand how anyone could hurt you like this. You’re so… innocent.”

Briar blushes slightly. “It’s… it’s not so bad.”

“You’ve got a black eye, Briar. And you’ve got scars all over your back. And-”

“How… how do you know about that?” Briar questions.

I falter and look away, not wanting to answer.

“Kayden, answer me. How do you know about the scars on my back?”

“I might have watched you when you were swimming.”

“You… what?” His voice has dropped again. “You were spying on me?”

I hold my hand up as he stands up to leave. “Briar, please wait! I’m sorry, I know it’s creepy and weird, but it got so boring here and you always seemed so… so interesting. You gave me something to look forward to every day.”

“I’m sorry, Kayden… I should go.”

“Briar,  _ no _ !” Briar flinches at my tone, and I feel a thrill of guilt. “Don’t go.”

Briar stops, but I’m pretty sure it’s out of fear more than anything. His eyes are wide, and my heart aches. The last thing I’ve ever wanted is him to be afraid of me. His hands are shaking.

“Don’t be afraid of me, please. I won’t hurt you. You know that.”

“But I’ve upset you.”

“No, you haven’t, Briar. I just don’t want to be the reason why you go back to town. I know you don’t want to be there right now. Please just sit down and we can talk about this. If anything, I’ve upset you.”

Briar sits back down, curled up in his normal ball again. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for everything, Briar. Do you want to tell me where you got the scars on your back?”

“I… I’ve never told anyone.” Briar’s biting his lip again, reopening the tiny cut on his bottom lip. “I… I don’t know. Do you really care?”

“If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t ask. Who am I gonna tell, the birds?” I glance over at where Zena’s pouncing at a group of red birds. “You can trust me, Briar.”

“My mom… she… she cut me the first time when… when she was drunk. Then it just… it just became a thing, I guess. It’s no big deal.”

I shake my head rapidly. “Briar, that’s not okay. Did she cut you with a knife?”

Briar nods slowly. “Yes. One of those small kitchen knives.”

“Briar-”

“I know something’s wrong with it, Kayden, but I can’t do anything about it.”

I recoil a bit at the force behind his words, and Briar winces while he mutters an apology. “It’s alright. Why don’t you leave? What about your dad?”

“He’s… he’s in the hospital. Has been for a year now. He’s been staying with his parents since I was 15.”

“Oh. I’m sorry. What’s he in the hospital for?”

“Leukemia treatment. My grandparents are paying for the treatments, and it’s expensive. And stressful. I promised Dad I’d hang tight here until he can come back to get me. I’m supposed to watch after Mom, too.”

“Does he know about… about her?”

Briar shakes his head almost before I’ve finished posing my question. “I can’t.”

“Why not? I’m sure he’d find some way to help you.”

“I don’t want him to hate me,” Briar says, like it should be obvious.

I frown at him. “Why would he hate you?”

“Because. I’d be saying terrible things about the person he loves. I doubt he’d forgive that.”

There’s so much wrong with the way he thinks. I just want to shake him, honestly, tell him what’s wrong with it and get him to understand that it shouldn’t be like this. “Briar, no. That’s not okay. She’s abusing you. Lots of people are abusing you. You have to tell someone. A principal. A teacher. The police.”

“You think I haven’t done all of that? I  _ tried _ . The principal sent me right back to class. Most of the teachers side with the bullies. The police ignore me.”

“That’s wrong on so many levels. Briar… You’re not safe in Tremont.”

“I can’t just leave my mother, Kayden. Who would cook?”

“She’s an  _ adult _ . She can take care of herself.”

Briar winces when Zena jumps at him and pressing herself into his stomach. “Ow… ow, Zena.”

I scoot closer to him. “Are you alright?”

“Fine.” He sounds pained, gingerly rubbing his stomach.

“You feel sick?”

“I’m  _ fine _ , Kayden.”

I shake my head. “No, you’re not. What’s wrong?”

“Just a bruise, Kayden.”

“How bad is it?” Briar shrugs, so I continue. “Let me see.”

“Kayden…”

I give him a small smile. “I just want to see how badly you’re hurt.”

Slowly, Briar pulls his shirt up. I want to go after whoever did this to him. There’s a bruise spanning his stomach, the dark blue and purple contrasting sharply with his pale skin. I want to hold him, keep him safe from all the bullies. Briar sighs and lays down, petting Zena as he keeps her by his side.

“Oh my god, Briar… How bad does it hurt?” I gently rest my hand on the bruise, and he shivers from the cold. “Sorry.”

“It’s… it’s okay, Kayden. It actually feels… nice. Is that weird?”

I smile at him kindly. “No, Briar. It’s okay. It probably helps the pain.”

“It does, a little bit.”

“What happened?”

“Brendan likes to punch and kick me there. It keeps me down ‘cause I can’t breathe.”

_ That’s so messed up. _ I keep running my hand lightly over the bruise because I can see a tiny, placid smile tugging at his lips. It makes him look even more adorable than he usually does. I love him so much. More than I had loved anyone before.

“Briar, I love you.”

Briar stops smiling for a second, his brows furrowing. “No, Kayden. Stop saying that.”

“I’m not gonna lie to you.”

Briar sits up, shaking his head. I feel bad for ruining his moment of peace. “Stop it. I’m not someone you should love.”

“Give me three good reasons why that’s true,” I say.

“I don’t look very masculine.”

“That’s a superficial reason, not a good one,” I counter. “And you’re cute.”

Briar blushes a little bit. “I cry over a lot of stupid stuff.”

“You’re very open with your emotions. That was a very rare thing, even the year I died. That’s 0 for 2.”

“I… I… I’m a curse, Kayden.”

I cross my arms, glancing down only to look as Zena jumps through me. Then my gaze slides right back up to meet Briar’s eyes. “Where’s the proof? Huh?”

“It’s… I was born on Friday the thirteenth.”

“It’s a day of the year. That isn’t proof.”

“Dad was diagnosed with Leukemia three days after I was born.”

_ Seriously? They pin that on an infant? _ “How on Earth can that be your fault?”

“The staff room caught fire the day I started preschool. A tornado destroyed the elementary school playground a week after I started. A gunman shot three people in the building the day I started high school.”

“Those are just coincidences, Briar.”

“Those are just the major events, Kayden. So many other things… They can’t  _ all _ be coincidences. Things don’t work like that.”

“They also can’t just blame them on you. Did  _ you _ set the fire? Did  _ you _ control the weather? Did  _ you _ shoot up the school?”

“N-No, but…”

“But nothing, Briar. It’s  _ not your fault _ !”

“Then tell them that!”

I recoil from him. He’s  _ never _ raised his voice in the time I’ve known him, not even when calling for Zena the other day. He curls in on himself immediately, pulling at his hair.

“I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell.”

“You’ve got every right to yell, Briar. You have every right to be angry at all of this. You  _ should _ yell. You  _ should _ be angry. I don’t see how you’re  _ not _ pissed off. If I was being treated this way, I would be screaming at everyone, fighting back. I wouldn’t be…” I trail off. I don’t want to accuse him of just letting it happen, but…

“If I hurt them, I’ll only give them further proof that I  _ deserve _ to be treated like crap.”

“So you’re just gonna lay there and let your mother cut you? Let Brendan choke you? Let Markus burn you?”

Briar looks away, blinking away tears. “Even if I did, what would I achieve? I can barely move the trunk in my room! Can we talk about anything else?”

I really don’t want to change the subject, but it’s upsetting him, so I comply. “Okay. Um… what’s your dad like?”

“He’s… he’s kind. He used to bury fake gems in our backyard and let me have my own archaeological digs.”

I have to smile at the thought of little Briar. He must have been so adorable! I almost say something, but he’s smiling as he continues, so I shut up.

“Once, I got bored and dug this huge hole. It ended up being deeper than I was tall. Dad turned around and just… couldn’t see me anymore. I yelled that I was stuck and Dad picked me up and took me inside so I could wash the dirt off me. I miss times like that.”

“Your father sounds like a wonderful man, Briar.”

“He is.”

A couple minutes pass by in a comfortable silence, Briar lost somewhere in his thoughts. Until he goes to say something, stops, and gnaws on his lip instead.

“What is it?”

“Um… Could you… would you mind… doing the thing again?”

I tilt my head at him, and he hides behind Zena so I can’t see him blush. “What thing?”

“I have a bruise… on my leg. Could you… maybe… You know, the thing.”

I nod with a small smile and scoot down some. Briar carefully rolls up his pants leg. The bruise there isn’t as recent as the others; it’s a less harsh-looking color. I lightly start running my hands over the bruise, loving the little smile gracing his face.

“I love you,” I whisper, not caring if he can hear me or not. 

He doesn’t love me back, and that’s okay. It won’t stop me from telling him that he  _ is _ loved.


	7. Briar

_**Chapter 7: Briar** _

I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed the festival weekend as much as I did with Kayden in Greystone. But… I feel weird. Which is why I’m sitting in the tree outside Serenity’s room at four A.M. on a Tuesday, waiting for her to open the window.

“Welcome back to civilization, Bri,” Serenity says once she slides her window open. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost. You okay?”

“Um… I don’t know. I feel weird.”

“Weird how?”

“I… I think I might… I think I’m starting to develop a crush on someone.”

Serenity practically drags me through the window. “Tell me all of the things!”

“I didn’t think… I didn’t think you’d care this much,” I mumble.

“I’m aromantic, that doesn’t mean I don’t care about romance. I just don’t experience it. Now tell me the things!”

She lightly pushes me onto her bed, making Zena mewl and jump away from me. “Well… I think I’m starting to… I don’t know, really. I think I have a crush on this… this guy.” I whisper the last word, unsure of how she’d react. I don’t want to lose the one friend I have.

“What was that?”

“I might have a crush on a guy.”

“I had a feeling that’s what you said.”

“Well, I- Wait, what?”

Serenity shrugs. “Just had a feeling, I suppose. I mean, I saw you staring at Zander every once and awhile.”

Okay, I  _had_ thought Zander was hot. I’d admit that, to Serenity, at least. Nobody else. People already don't like me; I won’t add another thing to cause more hatred. “Yeah, okay. That’s fair enough.”

“Do I know this boy?”

“No. He’s from out of town.”

Serenity raises an eyebrow. “Where and when did you meet him?”

“Thursday, when Brendan ran me off campus. I met him in the western side of Greystone. He was on some nature walk.” I don’t like that I’m good at lying, but I have to admit that it has its advantages.

“Continue.” Serenity grabs Zena and starts rubbing her head. “What’s he like?”

“He’s... loud, energetic… But he’s nice to me. He actually seemed concerned if I was upset by his actions.”

“That’s good. What’s his name?”

“Kayden.”

Serenity hums and lets Zena go to explore the room. “What makes you think you have a crush?”

I shrug, picking at a loose thread on my shirt. “When I’m around him… I don’t know. I’ve never felt these things before. When I was with him over the weekend… I started wanting to spend more time with him. I  _wanted_  to be around him. I actually stopped stuttering, for the most part, around him. I guess I feel comfortable around him? It’s not a massive crush, don’t get me wrong. But it’s more than anything I’ve felt for anyone before. More than my fleeting crush on Zander. It’s not normal, is it? To have a crush so fast?”

“From what my other friends have told me, it is. They have crushes all the time. Tell him how you feel.”

“What? No!”

Serenity rolls her eyes. “Just talk to this Kayden dude. If you don’t want things to go too fast, make sure he knows this too. I-”

Someone knocks on her door. It’s her dad, judging by the force of the knocks. I move towards the window, but Serenity grabs me and pulls me back to her bed.

“Yes, Dad?”

Her dad opens the door and glares at me. “I want him out of here, or I’m dragging him back to his shack of a home. Let Lorelei deal with him.”

“Briar’s not leaving,” Serenity says, crossing her arms. “I happen to enjoy talking to him. He’s a nice person.”

“He’s nothing but a curse!” Cason yells, yanking me away from Serenity by my burned hand.

“OW!”

Cason glares and backhands me with enough force to make my lip sting. “Shut. Up.”

“Please,  _please_  just let go of that hand. It  _hurts_!”

“Does it look like I give a damn? Now stop talking before I pop you again.”

Serenity throws her hands up in frustration. “Dad, Briar didn’t  _do_  anything!”

“Serenity, no. Don’t-” Cason’s grip on my hand tightens, bringing tears to my eyes and cutting me off. I don’t want her to get in trouble.

“I’ve told you, time and time again,  _not_  fraternize with this abomination!”

Cason starts dragging me out before Serenity can protest further. Zena hisses as she’s scooped up harshly on the way out the door.

“I don’t know why Lorelei keeps you around,” Cason grumbles. He drags me downstairs, still gripping my burned hand too tightly despite the bandage clearly showing that I’m injured. He yanks the back door of his squad car open. “Get in.”

I comply, thankful that he lets go of my hand. It’s throbbing, and part of me wishes Kayden were here to help the pain go away. Then I realize Cason still has Zena in the front with him.

“C-Can I have my cat back?”

He ignores me, instead muttering to himself. “I can’t believe I’m putting my patrol on hold to deal with your cursed ass.”

“I would’ve left on my own,” I whisper.

“Shut up.”

“Yes, sir.” He stops outside the animal shelter and gets out, holding Zena, and I immediately start shakily knocking on the window. “Wa-wait! Don’t take Zena in there! They’ll… they’ll kill her!”

Cason either can’t hear me or doesn’t care; he just keeps walking. I’m already crying, wanting desperately to do something.  _Anything_. But there’s not much I can do from the back of a cop car. Or against a cop, for that matter. He’d probably just tase me.

Every step Cason takes makes my heart sink a little more. Until I notice Zena clawing and squirming in his grip.

_Come on. Come on. Get out of it, Z._  What small hope I gain is almost diminished once he reaches the door, but he has to take one hand off of Zena to open the door. Zena scratches him once more and runs off once he lets go. I can’t see where she runs to, but I don’t care. She’s safe. Hopefully.

Cason is pissed when he gets back in the car. “You planned that, didn’t you? You knew!”

“How could I have…” I trail off when he glowers at me. I stay silent the rest of the drive to my house.

He orders me to wait, not that I have a choice, as he heads inside. To my dismay, Markus walks out with him.  _Maybe I can make it to my room before Markus grabs me?_  I doubt that I can, but the worst that can happen is Markus getting very angry and leaving me unconscious on the floor. Again. Yeah, maybe I won’t leg it.

Cason opens the door, and I don’t have a chance to react before Markus hauls me out of the car by my shirt. _I won’t be running._

“Lorelei is out right now. But I’ll take care of him.”

Cason smiles. “I’m sure you will.”

I tune out, but they keep talking for a couple minutes, continuing to chat normally as if I’m not being dangled off the ground by my shirt collar. Markus carries me inside effortlessly.

“You just can’t leave people alone, can you? And you woke me up.”

I don’t respond, only yelping when Markus practically throws me on the ground. Pain arcs up my back from where I land on what feels like a tape measure. I subtly shift off of it and draw my knees to my chest to help protect my stomach and chest.

Markus is smiling. “Guess you didn’t learn after last time. I’ll just have to fix that.”

_Oh no. No._

 

* * *

 

Two hours. Markus beat me with a belt for two hours. Everything hurts. But I push myself up weakly. It hurts to breathe.

I’m not entirely sure where Markus is. I might have blacked out and then he just walked away, but I’m not going to question it too much. I drag myself to my room. I could put myself in more pain trying to move the trunk to keep Markus out, or I could just collapse in bed and deal with the repercussions.

I don’t even realize I’m crying until I fall face-down on my bed and tears start soaking my pillow case. I can feel small amounts of blood dripping from a couple of open wounds on my back and arms where the belt had broken skin.

_Kayden would help with the pain._

“He’d also think I was weak for letting it happen.” Talking hurts; my throat’s sore from screaming.

_Kayden isn’t that mean._

I groan. The last thing I want to do is get caught up thinking about my feelings for Kayden, whatever they might be. I’m in too much pain to be trying to piece together these weird feelings. It’s probably little more than a fleeting crush.

_I wish he was here to do the thing._

Yeah, not thinking about Kayden is harder than it should be.

My door swings open, and I tense up.  _Wonder what he’s gonna hit me with now?_

“Briar, holy shit!”

“Serenity?”

Painfully, I roll over and sit up to look at her. She rushes over and pushes me back down, making me cry out.

“Sorry, I just...Briar, what the hell happened?”

I shrug. It’s not the first time she’s seen me after a beating. I’m more concerned with why she’s in my house. I don’t want her to get in trouble for being here.

“Do you have an ice pack? Something?”

I shake my head, not because we don’t have any, but because it won’t do much for me.

“Your entire body is going to be purple tomorrow,” Serenity mutters. “Hey, sorry about my dad. He’s just being a jackass.”

“It’s okay.”

Serenity shakes her head. “No, it’s not, Briar. He had no right to take Zena away from you, or to drag you out like that.”

“Zena got away, luckily.”

“Briar, you’re bleeding!”

“Yeah, it’s not big de-”

Serenity shushes me and pushes my shirt up. “Markus is a bastard,” Serenity says angrily. “He hit you with a belt?!”

“How can you tell?”

“Maybe from the imprint of the belt buckle on your chest?”

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I vaguely remember feeling the metal hit me, but I hadn’t registered it. “Oh. That explains why it hurt to breathe.”

Serenity’s eyes widen. “You should go to a hospital! He could’ve damaged your ribs or something!”

“I can’t go to the hospital. Can’t afford it. Mom won’t take me.”

“Or you could leave.”

“Stop saying that, Serenity. You know why I can’t.”

Serenity sighs. “Alright, fine. I’m not going home yet, though. Tell me more about your little crush.”

I shrug and drape an arm over my face. “I don’t know what it is Serenity. It’s… confusing and new and weird and I just… I don’t know.”

“You’ve already said you were comfortable around him, but is there anything else?”

“Well, I, uh… I kinda wish he were here when I was in pain. That’s not normal.”

Serenity smiles. “That’s so cute. Briar’s got a crush.”

“It’s probably just a passing crush. I doubt it will go anywhere.”

“Well, if you start thinking or daydreaming about him, it  _might_  be more than a passing crush.” Serenity’s phone rings, and she sighs and walks out to answer it.

I gently rub my arm, struggling not to yelp in pain as I brush over a bruise. She winds up having to leave for school, with a promise to bring me my missed work.

As I’m laying there, looking at the sun rays on the floor, I start thinking about Kayden. More specifically, about Kayden holding my hand and ‘rubbing’ my bruises.

_This might be more than a passing crush._


	8. Kayden

**_Chapter 8: Kayden_ **

I already miss Briar, and he’s only been gone for a day. But I have something to look forward to; he’s promised to be back after school today.

He likes school, which is kind of weird, considering the bullies, but I like that it makes him happy. Zena comes running across the brook before the sun rises. She looks frightened, and she’s alone.

“What are you doing here all alone?”

Obviously, I don’t expect an answer, but it’s strange. Briar seems so protective of Zena. For good reasons, yes, but insanely protective.

_She probably just ran here while Briar went to school._

But school doesn’t start before the Sun rises. I do my best not to worry. I’ve never _liked_ worrying, but I can’t help but to worry about him. Briar’s in so much danger in Tremont. I can’t not worry.

“I’m sure he’s okay, right, Zena?”

I settle down next to the brook to wait, thinking of Briar the entire time.

Noon passes, and Briar doesn’t stop by to chat. That doesn’t mean anything.

Judging from the Sun, he’s still not here at five P.M.

I get really worried when dusk comes and there’s no sign of Briar. Zena curls up to sleep by a rock. I sit by the brook until morning, without Briar showing up.

“What if Brendan killed him?” I ask Zena, unable to keep my voice from shaking. The thought of Briar’s dead body is… heart-wrenching. “What if Markus killed him? Or _is_ killing him? What if he’s like locked up somewhere, starving to death or… What if they’re killing him slowly? What if-”

Zena meows, and I swear she shakes her head. It does little to console me.

I’m still sitting in the same spot when Briar _finally_ walks up. Well, limps up. I stand up as Briar slowly crosses the brook.

There’s a red mark across his mouth, and new bruises on his forearms. And the obvious limp has my heart aching for him.

“Briar… What happened?”

“Zena! You’re here!” Briar kneels down, wincing at the motion, and takes Zena into his arms. He holds her close and buries his head in her fur. “I’m so glad you escaped.”

“What happened? Where were you yesterday?”

Briar doesn’t answer, just sits down. “Kayden… could you do the thing?”

I kneel down next to him as he pulls his shirt off. “Briar-”

“Please, don’t… don’t ask yet,” Briar cuts in.

I nod, and he lays down on his stomach, though I don’t understand how even _that’s_ tolerable. There are bruises covering nearly every inch of his torso. I can see three imprints of a belt buckle on his back, one directly between his shoulder blades. There’s dried blood on his back as well.

“Where do you want me to give you a massage?” That’s the best way to put it, I suppose.

“My lower back. It’s… it’s killing me.”

I nod and start running my hands over the red bruises there. He sighs softly as the colder air helps relieve the pain. “This is why you didn’t come here after school yesterday.”

“I couldn’t even walk _to_ school yesterday, Kayden,” Briar whispers, resting his forehead on his forearm. “I used up all my strength putting up a barricade at like noon, to keep Markus out yesterday and then basically slept all day.”

“Markus did this to you?” I ask.

Briar nods timidly. “Serenity’s dad dragged me home, and woke Markus up. Markus was pissed, and well… you see what happened. At least he didn’t leave me unconscious this time.”

“ _This time_? Briar, this has happened before?” I get a nod in response, and my hatred for Markus grows. “This exact thing?”

“No, no. Last time, he only hit me with it for an hour, but he hit me in the head and knocked me out. I woke up on the porch.”

“Briar, that’s really bad.” As I’m going to massage the spot just above his hips, I notice a clear imprint of a belt wrapping around his side, just across his ribs. “You might have rib damage. Briar, roll over!”

Briar does so, and I wince at how bad that side looks. It’s not as bad as his back, but it’s still more painful-looking than I’d like. There a clear mark from the belt buckle directly over a couple of his ribs.

“You need to see a doctor. He could’ve bruised your ribs, or worse.”

“I can’t go to a doctor.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Mom won’t take me. And we can’t afford it.”

I shake my head. “What if he had broken your ribs? What if one of them had punctured your lung?” Briar closes his eyes and looks away with a sigh. “Answer me, Briar. Briar!”

“I don’t know, Kayden!” Briar blurts. “I’d probably die on the floor, then! So what?”

“So? So?! Briar, you don’t deserve to die, especially not like that.”

“And you did? You deserved to be murdered? Why are you yelling at _me_?!” His voice stays quiet despite how frustrated- or mad- he is. Briar sits up and tugs his shirt back on angrily. Zena hisses almost in response to the anger.

“Because I want you to listen, Briar! I want you to understand that this is _wrong_! I was so worried yesterday, you know? Worried that they would kill you. That they _had_ killed you, and I’d never see you again.”

“Why would that bother you so much?”

“I love you, Briar. How many times do I have to tell you that until you understand it?”

“K-Kayden… stop yelling at me.”

I go to say something else, but take in the fear in his eyes. He’s shaking, blinking back tears. “Briar, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell, I just… I’m angry at the people that did this to you. I don’t see how they could do this to someone like you.”

“What do you mean, ‘someone like me’?”

“Someone sweet and innocent and just… kind.”

Briar blushes and looks away. “You hardly know me.”

“I know you’re one of the nicest people I’ve ever known. Despite all the anger and violence directed at you, you’re still a good person.”

“You don’t know that for sure, Kayden. I could be a closeted psychopath.”

I raise an eyebrow at him. “Really? Briar, I’ve seen you put baby birds back in their nest when you were in this forest. I’ve seen you rescue a lizard that got stuck under a rock. You’re a good person, Briar.”

Briar smiles at me. It’s a tiny, barely visible smile, but it’s something. “I’m glad someone thinks so.”

“I know so.”

We lapse into quiet for a few seconds while Zena nuzzles at Briar’s collarbone and purrs.

“I can give you another massage, if it still hurts? And to make up for yelling.”

“That would be nice.”

Briar lays back down, on his back this time, and pulls his shirt up. I start trailing my hands over his sides, and he smiles faintly.

“I really didn’t mean it, you know?”

“Huh?”

He looks so relaxed now. I like it. “The yelling. I’ve always been very open with my anger, but I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

“Why not?”

“I wasn’t angry at you. I’ll never be mad at you. I was more… ticked off with your situation, and I took it out on you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, Kayden.”

I nod, glad he’s not still upset. “You mentioned someone named Serenity earlier. Who’s that?”

“She’s my friend. Her dad doesn’t like me, which… which is why she wants to be my friend.”

“I don’t get it.”

Briar shrugs and shudders for a second when my hand goes through him a little. “Didn’t you ever have friends that you hung out with only because your parents said you couldn’t?”

“No. My parents liked my friends.”

“Oh. Well, that’s what she’s doing. It’s like her own little rebellion.”

“So she’s basically using you?”

Briar frowns. “I wouldn’t call it that. She doesn’t really gain anything from being friends with me. Even if she was, I’ll take what I can get. She cares about me, at least.”

“Cares about you how?”

“I don’t… in like a brother/sister way, I guess? Why does it matter?”

“It doesn’t, I just… Just checking,” I answer, making sure to pay extra attention to the spots where the belt buckle made its mark. “I’m glad you’re not all alone.”

“Me too.”

_At least he didn’t notice me acting jealous._ “Why don’t you believe me when I say I love you?”

“Nobody loves me, Kayden.”

“I do, Briar.”

“I don’t know how I can believe that.”

I sigh heavily. “Briar… what can I do to make you believe me?”

“I don’t know,” Briar says. “I don’t know what’s going on, okay? This… nobody’s loved me in _this_ way before. I don’t know what to do.”

I stop massaging his chest and scoot up a little bit and lean over him, cautiously, lightly cupping his face. “Briar, I love you. More than any boyfriend I had before. I don’t know how, but someway, someday, I _will_ make you believe me.”

Briar’s mouth has opened a little bit, though it might be from the cold. “Kayden… please just… please take things slowly. I can’t stop you from ‘loving me’, but I don’t know how all of this works. I don’t know what my feelings are. I need you to respect that.”

“Yeah, of course. Yeah, I can do that.”

“The boyfriends you had before... Did you date in secret?”

I shake my head as Briar sits up. “Nope. You’re asking that because I’m gay, right?” Briar nods, so I continue. “I came out when I was eleven. I started dating openly when I was thirteen.”

“Nobody hurt you because you’re gay?”

“No. Some people said some nasty things, but my city was pretty open-minded.”

“People here say being gay is wrong,” Briar says quietly.

I nod. “I figured as much. Just so you know, most places aren’t like Tremont. You want to ask something?”

Briar nods timidly. “What… what were your boyfriends like?”

“Well, I had two official boyfriends before… the murder. The first boy I dated, we were both thirteen. He was a break dancer. We went to the movies for our first date. He had these really pretty green eyes and his hair was dip-dyed neon orange. The second boy was a surfer from California. He had this really soft sandy blonde hair. We went to the beach for our first date. I was still dating him, when I was killed.”

Briar gasps. “That’s so sad, Kayden. He must have been devastated.”

“I try not to think about it. It’s too depressing.”

“Your family must have been crushed.”

I shrug, even though thinking about my family hurts. “Yeah.”

“Do you think they’re still looking for you?” Briar asks.

“Possibly, but I doubt it. It’s been three years. Statistics showed that the chance of finding a kidnap victim alive is very slim after twenty-four hours. I don’t think they’d be looking for me now. Mom probably still looks sometimes, though.”

“I wish my mom would care enough to do that,” Briar whispers. “She’d probably go out and drink.”

I shake my head. “Your mom isn’t a good mom.”

“I know.” Then Briar’s eyes widen and reaches forward like he’s going to grab my shoulder. His hand passes through me, but he continues anyway as Zena crawls onto his lap. “What if we found your body?”

“Briar… I’m not sure you’d want to see my body if we found it.”

“So you don’t know where your body is?”

“No. I ‘woke’ up, on the banks over there.”

Briar hums. “What if your killer is still out there?”

“I don’t know if he’d be out there… If he was, I wouldn’t want you getting involved with him.”

“But if he is, then he might do that to someone else, if he hasn’t already. Someone has to stop him.”

I shake my head. I’m happy that he wants to help people. “Briar, no. You’re in enough danger just being in Tremont. You’re not getting involved with a kidnapper and murderer.”

“I guess you’re right. When I’m in less pain, can we start looking for your body?”

“Sure, Briar.”


	9. Briar

**_ Chapter 9: Briar _ **

“Hey, Serenity?”

Serenity yells something at someone in the background then responds to me. “Yes?”

“Could you… could you give me a ride to Newport?” I ask softly. If Mom catches me on the phone, she’ll be mad, and I physically cannot take another beating right now. But I have to get to the library to do research. “Please? I can pay you.”

“Briar, you don’t have to pay me. I’ll be there in five.”

“Thank-” Serenity hangs up before I can finish. I hear footsteps and put the phone back on the base then take a few steps away from the table it rests on. “Good morning.”

Mom doesn’t say anything, just shoves past me into the kitchen. “Take out the trash.”

“Yes ma’am,” I answer, nudging Zena back towards my room while Mom walks away. Empty all the trash cans into one bag, then grab the other large bag from the kitchen.

I walk down to the dump and throw the bags in the dumpster, then rush into my house and grab Zena. Serenity pulls up outside and blares her horn. Mom shoots me a glare.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“S-Serenity’s driving me to Newport. On… on her way to the mall.”

“You’re not taking any of _my_ money.”

_Dad’s money, you mean._ In between his couple relapses, Dad had made sure to save part of his paycheck for us in case he didn’t recover. I watched that money go towards alcohol and even drugs, once or twice. But I can’t say that.

“I won’t, Mom.”

I hurry outside before she can say anything further. Serenity waves and points to the backseat. I open the door and sit down, only to realize the car is quiet, aside from the radio playing softly. Serenity’s friends are staring at me.

“Why is it in your car?” the redhead asks. I’m not sure what her name is. _Cassidy, maybe?_

“ _Briar_ is here because he’s my friend and needs a ride,” Serenity shoots back as she pulls onto the road. “Fix your hair.”

I jump a little when a hair brush is tossed into my lap, narrowly missing Zena. She hisses, and I rush to pet her so she’ll quieten down. I brush through my hair and fix my sweater’s collar.

“You let him bring extra bad luck into your car? Serenity, do you have a death wish?” I know the black-haired girl’s name; Alyssa. She glares at Zena, and I pull the cat closer to my chest.

“Leave Briar alone, Lyss. Or you can walk home.”

I’m grateful that Serenity is standing up for me, but her friends seem annoyed, so I intervene as kindly as I can. “It’s… it’s o-okay, Serenity.”

“‘It’s o-okay,’” Alyssa mutters.

“Strike two,” Serenity says in a sing-song voice. “Unless you want to walk home without seeing your boyfriend in Newport, stop mocking Briar.”

Alyssa falls quiet and basically presses herself up against the door in an obvious attempt to get as far away from me as she can. I curl up a little in my seat and turn towards the window to watch the trees and houses go by.

Serenity and her friends chat during the entire two hour drive. She tries to coax me into the conversations a couple of times, but I say very little. Nobody really cares what I have to say.

_Except Kayden._

Outside the library, the car hits a pothole, and I struggle to contain a yelp as my side hits the seat harshly. I might be in significantly less pain, but the worst of my bruises are still sensitive.

“Thanks for the ride, Serenity,”

“You’re welcome. I’ll be here to pick you up at two, okay?”

I nod, and she drives off. The librarian smiles at me as I enter, but the smile lessens a bit when she notices Zena cradled in my arms.

“You know the rules, dear.”

“I know, Mrs. Corrine, but she wasn’t feeling well this morning, and I wanted to keep her close. I promise I’ll keep a careful eye on her.”

Mrs. Corrine nods, and I walk back to the computers. I sit at the one on the end so I’m less noticeable and pull up the browser.

I type in ‘information about ghosts’ first, just so I can learn more about it. The webpage is surprisingly helpful.

Kayden isn’t just a death echo, which is relaxing after I learn what those are. Having to be stuck in a loop of your own death must be terrible.

“‘Ghosts need energy to manifest, with the most prevalent sources of energy being moving water or things like batteries,’” I read aloud.

I read that page for a few minutes more then open a new tab and look up ‘ways police officers locate bodies.’

There are a couple images on the web page I bring up, one of them an old, black and white, crime scene photo. Even without color, the sight is gruesome and my stomach lurches. Zena meows and paws at me, so I reach down to pet her while I read. Cadaver dogs… A suspect’s confession.

Both things I won’t have access to.

On a whim, I clear that search and type in ‘missing persons cases in Oregon, 2015.’ The sheer amount of them is disheartening. Adults, teens, children… How can the world be this way?

It takes nearly fifteen minutes of scrolling through reports until I see a familiar mop of blonde hair and then deep brown eyes.

“‘Kayden Grace, age 17, went missing from his home on February 17, 2015.’” I glance down at Zena and click the ‘read more’ button. “‘The parents returned home to find the front door’s lock destroyed, and the house ransacked. Kayden was nowhere to be found.’”

The rest of the article explains that there were no clear motives for the kidnapping, and shows his family’s desperate interviews asking for Kayden’s safe return. My heart aches for all of them. The twin girls are crying, Kayden’s mom is choked up, and his dad looks like he hasn’t slept in days.

There aren’t a ton of details on the investigation, but there are a handful. Like how they searched city-wide for any signs of where he’d been taken, even traced his cell phone until it died or was destroyed just outside of Medford. His body was never recovered, and the case was listed as a cold case.

I click back onto the tab about ghosts. According to the site, a spirit is either tied to where the person died, or where there body is buried. So Kayden was either killed in Greystone, or his body is there.

I jot down notes about finding a body, ghosts, and details on Kayden’s disappearance on a piece of paper I get from Mrs. Corrine and then close out of the browser. I almost leave, but then I sit back down and type ‘Kayden Grace’ into a new search bar.

“‘Ashland high schooler finishes second at the USA Swimming Olympic Trials swim meet.’ Zena, Kayden could have qualified for the Olympics had he had more time to compete! Someone robbed him of everything. Robbed his family of a son and brother… How can anyone be so cruel?”

I click over to images. There’s a Facebook profile picture, followed by a few of Kayden sitting alongside a pool in swim shorts. I find myself glancing at his visible abs, then chastise myself for it. My feelings are still swarming all over the place, and this isn’t helping. I close the window and stand up.

Mrs. Corrine walks over and hands me a cookie in a plastic bag. “It’s got peanuts in it, and I’m allergic. Here, you can have it.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”

“It’s nice to see a young man so polite,” Mrs. Corrine says.

I smile and put the cookie in my jeans pocket before I walk outside. I still have almost an hour until Serenity comes to pick me up. I hold Zena close and end up wandering around the city. The first place I go to is the docks. The boats bobbing in the water, along with the sound the water makes is soothing. I like it.

“Hey, kid.”

I look up when the person speaks. There’s a man standing over me, holding a fishing pole.

“I fish here. You need to move.”

I nod and stand up then walk to the park nearby. I sit on a bench and relax. There are kids running around, squealing with laughter and playing games. I’m not surprised; it’s Saturday, and they’re probably excited to be out of school.

A kid runs past me and trips, skinning his hands and knees, and a man runs up behind him as he starts crying.

“P-Papa, it _hurts_!” the boy wails.

“Hey, shh, it’s okay. C’mon, I’ll take care of it.”

The father carries his son away. I miss having moments like this with my dad. He used to always comfort me when someone shoved me down on the playground or when one of the bigger kids hit me.

I miss him more than anything. I’ll have to visit him soon.

I check the time on my watch and head back to the library to meet Serenity. Serenity isn’t here yet, but Alyssa and the other girl are.

I take a step back. “Um… wh-what’s going on?” I tuck my paper in my pocket.

“You think Serenity likes you, curse?”

“I… I don’t… Wh-why are you d-doing this?”

They’re walking towards me, backing me around the corner of the building,

Alyssa snorts derisively. “You’re _nothing_. You could disappear tomorrow and no one would care.”

“What… what did I do to you?” I whisper.

The redhead shoves me against the wall. “Shut up. I will not let you curse Serenity.”

Before anything else happens, Serenity pulls up. She slams her car door shut and stomps over. “Alyssa! Caitlin! What did I say about Briar?”

“We’re trying to protect you!” Alyssa says. “He’s bad luck!”

Serenity grabs me and pulls me to her car. “You’re both walking home.”

I don’t say anything until we’re moving. “S-Serenity?”

“Yes?”

“I’m so-sorry.”

“You didn’t do anything, Briar.”

I shake my head. “Your friends are mad at you. You only hang out with me ‘cause people say not to. They’re your real friends. I’m not.”

Serenity looks at me as she changes lanes to pull into a fast food place’s parking lot. “Briar… you really think that way?” I nod slowly. Serenity sighs. “Briar, no. Yes, at first, I hung out with you because Dad told me not to. It was interesting, to rebel that way. But then I realized how lonely you were, and that you needed a friend. That’s why I keep hanging out with you.”

“I’m not sure I believe that, but okay.”

“Briar…” But she doesn’t say anything else, just pulls up to the drive through. “What do you want?”

“I don’t… I haven’t had McDonald’s since I was six.”

She sighs and orders me a cheeseburger and Dr. Pepper. She gets a Big Mac and tea. The cheeseburger is delicious.

“Did you tell Kayden how you felt?”

I choke on my sip of Dr. Pepper. “Wh-what?”

“Did you tell Kayden how you felt?” Serenity repeats.

“I told him that I was confused and needed him to take… whatever this is… slowly,” I admit.

Serenity smiles at me. “I’m glad you did that. Have you figured out your feelings?”

“Not yet.”

I’m lying through my teeth. I understand my feelings better now. I’m falling for Kayden, and I’m falling for him hard.


	10. Kayden

** Chapter 10: Kayden **

Briar looks beautiful. He’s walking across a tree that fell across the creek. He has his arms stretched out at his sides, and he’s smiling.

He seems so at peace.

I’m floating alongside him, listening to him singing under his breath. Zena is following in his footsteps, cautious of the water beneath her.

“You’re not half bad, Briar.”

Briar blushes and glances at me. “If you say so, Kayden. So… I did some research today.”

“About?”

“Ghosts. How to find a body. And… Your disappearance.”

I stop a few feet behind him as he reaches the end of the tree and jumps down, landing lightly on his feet. “What… what did you find out?”

“A lot. I took notes.”

Briar sits down and pulls a folded paper out of his pocket and holds it up so I can read it. His handwriting is in incredibly neat cursive, everything organized under different headings and bulleted.

“Better notes than I ever took.”

Briar smiles. “My notes for school aren’t this neat, just so you know.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not allowed to write with my left hand,” Briar explains, nodding towards his left hand. He’s kept the bandage off of it for a couple days, and it’s healing pretty well. Judging from the very infrequent wincing, the bruises are healing too. “Another superstition here.”

“I really hate your town, you know that?” Briar nods, and I start reading his notes. “My family did interviews on the news? What did they say?”

“Well… your sisters were crying too hard to say anything. Your mom could hardly talk. She said… she asked whoever took you to bring you back to them. That they didn’t care about the things the burglars stole. They just wanted their son back, and…”

Briar trails off when he notices how sad I look.

“Kayden… I’m sorry someone took your life away from you. I’m sorry some people are so heartless.” It’s odd that he says this. He deals with- to my knowledge- heartless people on a daily basis. I don’t expect him to be this optimistic. “I saw an article on the Olympics Trials meet, too.”

“You did?”

“Yeah. If someone hadn’t been so cruel, you could’ve gone on to the Olympics.”

I nod and then see my name jotted down in the bottom corner of the page, in Briar’s lovely writing. I don’t comment on it, wanting to respect his wish for me to take things slow, but I smile a little at it. Briar’s just so… innocent and sweet. I wish I could just wrap him up in a soft blanket and keep him safe from everyone that wants to hurt him.

“Do you think you would’ve done good at the Olympics?”

“I don’t know. I had hoped I would. I _loved_ swimming, obviously, but so would everyone else that would be there. I probably wouldn’t have even gotten to the Olympics.”

“I think you would have done great.” Briar tucks his notes back into his pocket.

“How are you so optimistic?”

Briar tilts his head, some of his longest curls falling across his eyes adorably. “What do you mean?”

“Just… you. You’re always so happy and… I don’t understand it. You’re surrounded by so much hatred yet you’re still this… ray of sunshine.”

Briar shrugs. “I don’t know… Golden rule, I guess. I hope that if I treat others the way I want to be treated, maybe they’ll change and treat me the same. It’s a stupid hope, I know.”

“I don’t think it’s stupid.”  Then I get up and rush through Briar, leaving him shuddering in my wake. “I have to show you something!”

“Kayden, wait!”

I glance back as I run through a tree. Briar’s scrambling to get up, Zena several steps ahead.

“Briar, I gotta show you something. Come on!”

I wait until he’s on his feet and pretty close behind me to keep running. It takes nearly an hour to reach the ravine.

“It’s cool to look at,” I say, staring down at the river churning so far below us. When I don’t hear a response, I look over. “Briar? Briar, what are you doing?!”

“Exploring!” Briar calls back, already a few feet down the jagged edges of the crevasse. “There could be cool minerals near the water. Maybe even geodes!”

“Briar, I’m glad you’re excited, but please be careful!”  He slips a little on the muddy surface, and my eyes go wide until he finds his footing again. “Briar!”

“I’m okay!” Briar calls back, landing lightly on his feet. “Come on, Kayden.”

I float down to him. Zena settles down a good distance from the water and watches Briar.  Briar is nudging the muddy banks of the river with his sneakers, stopping every few steps to look at the rocks he sees.  I sit down to watch.

He gasps suddenly and stoops over, snatching something off the ground. “It’s an arrowhead!” Briar yells.  He rushes over and crouches down in front of me, turning the object over in his hands as he explains what he can figure out from it.

But I’m not listening.  I try to, but… I’m too distracted by Briar.  His smile as he talks, the way his eyes are absolutely sparkling, the over-exaggerated hand motions.  

“-sorry.”  Briar apologizing breaks the trance he’d drawn me into.

“What? Why?”

“It’s stupid.  Boring. I’m sorry.”

I shake my head. “No. I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention. I got distracted.”

“By?”

“You.”

A light blush creeps onto his cheeks. “Why? I’m pretty average. According to everyone else, I’m a cruddy human.”

“Your smile. Your eyes. How excited you are about a carved rock. It’s cute.”

Briar’s blush darkens, but then he stares at me quizzically. “You look different. More… here.”

“What?”

Briar taps my shoulder. The point of contact does seem… odd, though I’m still adjusting to him seeing me. “You’re still not physically here, but… It’s like I can feel you a bit more. Like your presence is stronger. Feels almost like… fog early in the morning, when I’m walking near water. Running water _does_ give you energy.”

“I feel like I should test this.”

I focus completely on Zena, and she hisses and yowls as she’s lifted off the ground. Lifting something her size doesn’t seem to be taking as much energy now.

Briar gasps and waves his arm back like he’s trying to slap my chest. “Kayden! Put her down, you’re scaring her!”

“Sorry, sorry.” I let Zena down, giving Briar my best smile. “But you gotta admit, it was kinda funny.”

“It was mean,” Briar argues, but he’s fighting back a smile as he keeps walking along the river and looking at rocks.

“Do you look more like your mom or dad?” I ask after a minute, growing bored with just following behind him. The way he’s lightly biting his lip as he looks is cute.

“Both. I got my Mom’s curls and Dad’s hair color. And I have my dad’s eyes.”

That interests me. I float in front of him so I can look into his eyes. They’re such a beautiful brown. Almost chocolatey, but there’s this amber splashed through them. I _love_ being close enough to see these small details.

“Your eyes are amazing.”

I swear, Briar’s in a near constant state of blushing whenever I talk. He’s much too precious for all the cruelty.

“You’re always saying such nice things. Why?”

“Well, they’re true, Briar. You’re cute. And sweet. And interesting.”

“Kayden…” he trails off and looks up. Sun’s setting.”

I look up too. “Oh. Guess that means you need to go back to town?” My sense of time isn’t the best anymore, but it definitely doesn’t seem like the Sun should be setting already. I don’t want him to leave.

“Not necessarily. I could stay the night.”

“I don’t think we have time to make it back to our cave before dark.”

“We can just stay near the ravine,” Briar suggests.

I frown. “But won’t you get too cold?”

“I’m wearing a jacket. So long as it doesn’t rain, I should be alright.”

If Briar says he’ll be okay, I trust him. I wait at the top of the ravine for him. As Briar’s climbing, his foot slips, and I absently lunge for him like I’m going to catch him.

“I’m okay. I’m okay!” Briar calls up, finding a new foothold.

If I wasn’t already dead, I’m sure my heart would’ve stopped at the thought of him crashing down to the rocks at the bottom. He makes it up safely, and he sits down a few feet from the drop.

“I want to talk some more,” I say, getting momentarily distracted by Zena chasing a bird.

“About what?” Briar asks.

“Hmm… What kind of music do you listen to?”

“I don’t usually listen to music. Dad used to listen to country music, though, so maybe that? I have some of his CDs. I don’t have a CD player, but I have the discs.”

“He didn’t have a CD player?”

Briar looks away. “Mom sold it.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. I tried to talk her out of it, but she shouted at me and slapped me, so I… I gave up.”

“You have no idea how badly I want to hide you away somewhere safe and just… stay there forever where no one can hurt you again.”

Briar chuckles. “What, like a fortress?”

“Yeah. One just for us. And maybe Serenity, but I’m not so sure about her yet. And Zena, of course.”

Briar yawns and stretches, leaning back on his elbows. “Do you think aliens are real?” Briar asks suddenly.

“I’m not sure. Never thought about it.” I lay down next to him, but I’m not looking at the stars like he is. I’m too focused on him.

“The universe is huge. The chances of _all_ of that, all those planets, being empty… they’re so small. There’s gotta be something out there.”

“So you like history and science?”

Briar nods. “Kind of stemmed from me studying the Mayans. There was a lot about the stars in their culture.”

“If you could go anywhere, where would you go?”

Briar looks over at me. “Huh… probably Egypt. Dad said he’d take me, someday, but I’m not really gonna hope for that.”

“Why not?”

“As much as I want to pretend everything’s okay… This time marks his third relapse since the diagnosis. I just… I’m scared, Kayden. I know Mom doesn’t love me, and… I’m afraid Dad won’t pull through. I don’t… I’m already tearing up.”

He is, in fact, tearing up. I hate seeing tears pool in his eyes. “Crying’s okay, Briar. If my dad was sick, I’d cry too.”

“Crying only makes people laugh and hit me again, just to hear me cry.”

“Well, they’re nothing but sadists, then.”

“What’s a sadist?”

I’m not entirely surprised that he doesn’t know what it means. If anything, it makes him just a tiny bit more adorable. “It means, basically, that they like causing or seeing others in pain.”

“Oh.”

There are a few tears dripping down his face. So I decide to change topics, hoping to make him smile again. “What’s something you taught yourself that’s surprised people before?”

“Umm… I can do a kinda creepy walking backwards in a backbend thing?” Briar says uncertainly.

“How? Ooh, show me!”

Briar stands up and stretches, then does a backbend with apparently little effort. He takes a few steps backwards while maintaining the backbend, and, I’ll give it to him. It is kind of creepy. It would be _very_ creepy, if Briar wasn’t so cute. Zena meows and jumps on his stomach, and Briar makes a noise between a laugh and a gasp as his arms slip out from under him and he crashes onto his back.

“That was pretty scary.”

Briar smiles at me and cuddles Zena.

I’m not sure what time it is when Briar falls asleep, but I know he looks more peaceful this time that he did the last time. There’s even a tiny smile tugging at his pink lips. Zena curls up in his arms and falls asleep soon after.

I may not be sure of a lot of things, but I know Briar is special, and I want nothing more than to protect him, even though I can’t.

“Sweet dreams, Briar.”


	11. Briar

**_Chapter 11: Briar_ **

I yawn and stretch, feeling Zena crawl out of my arms. When I open my eyes, Kayden is floating above me with a smile on his face.

I yelp and reach up to push him away, my hand going through him. “KAYDEN!”

Kayden laughs and flips over, landing on his back on the ground. “Your… face… That was perfect!”

“Why… What were you doing?!”

“I don’t sleep, and I was bored. You’re adorable in your sleep, you know that?”

I feel the heat rising to my cheeks. “No one’s cute when they sleep.”

“You are. You have the softest snores and breaths… And you whisper when you’re asleep,” Kayden says. “Speaking of the whispering, what’s a Bipper?”

“It’s something from a cartoon I watched with Serenity. Don’t ask.”

“Ah. I didn’t watch cartoons much. Spent a lot of time practicing or helping my sisters practice basketball. I watched some shows about tattoos, though.”

I wince a little at the thought of getting a tattoo. “I hate needles. Having one poke you over and over must hurt.”

“It does.”

“You have a tattoo?” I ask. Then I wrap my arms around myself. “Sorry, it’s none of my business.”

Kayden shrugs. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay to be curious. But, yeah. I got one when I was sixteen.”

I really want to see it, but… I can’t just ask that. It’s none of my business. I’ve probably already pried too much anyway. So I stay quiet, wondering what it looks like. And where it is.

“Do you want to see my tattoo?” Kayden asks after a few seconds of me staying silent.

“I… I don’t… if it’s okay?” I manage, petting Zena’s soft fur to help calm my spiking anxiety.

“It’s perfectly fine, Briar,” Kayden says with one of his bright smiles.

He tugs his shirt off, and I immediately feel the heat rush to my face. I swear I can feel my ears and the back of my neck burning. _Don’t look at his abs. Don’t look. Briar, no._

I’m falling way too hard for him, and I don’t know what to do with these emotions. I just wish the butterflies would settle down and stop flying around in my stomach so wildly.

And he’s only been shirtless for a few seconds.

Kayden doesn’t comment on my blush, instead turning around. There’s a tattoo of a heart with angel wings in the middle of his back, between where his shoulder blades end.

“Wow… that’s pretty.”

“Thanks.”

As Kayden’s facing away from me, I notice a deep gash across the back of his neck. “Kayden?”

“Huh?”

“Do you know about the scar on the back of your neck?”

“Yeah.”

“Whoever did this to you is _seriously_ twisted.”

It’s a dumb thing to say. I know that. But I just… can’t think of anything else, too overwhelmed with the image of someone being that angry, that brutal… And how much it would’ve hurt. I’m used to certain pain by now, and even used to the presence of blood in some cases, but the vivid imagery of such a brutal act makes my stomach churn.

Kayden turns around to check on me, and I can finally see the scars across his chest clearly.

That’s all it takes. The sight of such deep, harsh cuts, along with the other small stab wounds… I can’t handle it.

I hit the ground hard, clutching my stomach as I heave.

I’m used to throwing up after getting punched in the stomach, but… I’m not used to someone kneeling down behind me and running their hands up and down my back while I puke. I can hardly feel him, but… it’s still a kind gesture. And the cool helps combat the fact that vomiting is making my body over heat.

“K-Kay… Kayden?”

My throat hurts. I haven’t really eaten anything since the McDonald’s Serenity bought me yesterday, and I hacked up some stomach acid.

“You need some water?”

I nod and push myself up and wipe the back of my hand across my mouth. I cautiously make my way down to the river at the bottom of the ravine. The fast-moving water can still have bacteria in it, but that’s better than the slow-moving creek water.

I cup my hands in the water and drink several handfuls of it while Kayden rubs my back again. Zena rubs her head against my thigh despite the close proximity to water.

“Why are you rubbing my back?”

“To help. That’s what I used to do when my sisters were throwing up. It helped them feel better.”

“How does it help?” I ask. I don’t understand it. How could rubbing someone’s back help with nausea?

“It doesn’t really help settle someone’s stomach, Briar. It’s just… comforting, for them. It lets them know that they’re not alone. Makes them happy.”

I nod slowly. I still don’t fully understand the reasoning, but… I’m not going to complain. Even when I’m done drinking water and wiping my mouth, Kayden continues to rub my back.

“I love you,” Kayden whispers.

I don’t respond, but my heart beats a little faster. I find myself looking over my shoulder at him. He has this gentle, concerned look on his face, and he’s focused on my back, but his gaze flicks up to meet mine as I start stuttering out words.

“I… I…”

“Hey, you don’t have to say anything, Briar. I know you want me to go slow. I respect that you don’t know how you feel-”

“I think I do know how I feel, Kayden,” I cut in. I resist the urge to apologize immediately, knowing that he’ll just say it’s okay. “I think… I think I like you. Think I’m… I’m falling for you.”

Kayden breaks into a huge grin and his eyes seem to shine brighter. “I’m still going to take things slowly, though, because you’ve never felt like this before. I’m glad you understand your feelings better now.”

“Me too. I was tired of being confused.”

“If it doesn’t bother you… say it again.”

“Huh?”

“That you like me. Say it again. You have no clue how long I’ve been hoping to hear those words from you.”

I’m blushing again; I can feel the heat rushing to my cheeks. “I like you.” Kayden’s smile somehow gets wider. I like the feeling of accomplishment I get from knowing that _I’m_ the reason he’s smiling. The feeling is alien, but I love it. “I like you,” I repeat. “I like you!”

Kayden laughs. “That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard. I love you! I love you more than anything!”

He hugs me. He’s phasing through me, and it’s freezing, but… I don’t tell him to stop. Even if his presence isn’t solid, I still love being hugged. I love that it’s pure _joy_ over something I did that makes him hug me. Kayden pulls back, and that huge grin is still on his face.

“You’re perfect, Briar. More than perfect.”

I pick Zena up and hold her close. She squirms to get comfortable and mewls softly. “I wish I could stay here forever… With Zena. And you.”

“I wish you could stay here too. But it would get so boring.”

I shrug. “Rather be bored than running from the people of Tremont.”

“Then leave.”

“It’s not that simple, Kayden.”

Kayden crosses his arms. “Why not?”

“I’ve told you… I promised Dad I’d… that I’d be brave until he could come get me.”

“He doesn’t know how bad it really is though, does he? You haven’t told him about Brendan, have you? Or your mom? How about Markus?”

I shake my head slowly. “No… No I haven’t. I can’t.”

“Briar, if your dad really loves you like you say he does, he’d want to know. So he could protect you. Like parents do.”

“But Mom and Markus say I should be brave and handle the bullies myself. That I should be strong.”

“ _They’re_ bullies!” Kayden argues. “You’re surrounded by toxicity… I just want to beat the crap out of every last one of them.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?”

I shrug again, and Zena paws at my stomach until I start petting her again. Instead of answering Kayden, I look down at the fraying ends of my sweater. “I like you,” I mumble.

“I love you. Why’d you apologize?”

“I don’t want you to be so worried about me.”

“But I _want_ to worry about you. I care about you.”

I shake my head slowly. “I still don’t like it, Kayden.”

“That’s fine. But I’m going to worry about you until I know you’re safe and happy,” Kayden promises, leaning towards me.  He’s incredibly close to me; I can feel the cold radiating from him clearly, making me shiver, but he doesn’t pull away. “Even if it’s not me who makes you happy.”

“What do you mean?”

Kayden smiles again, but he doesn’t look quite as happy. “Briar, I love you more than anything. But… We can’t be _together_. You’ve still got a life to live. You’ll meet someone else to be happy with. And even then, I’m going to worry about whether or not he or she is treating you like you deserve to be treated.”

I haven’t really thought about it, lately. Growing up and leaving Tremont. Before I started seeing Kayden, I had always sort of looked forward to it, despite being scared of screwing up once I was on my own. But now… There’s another feeling tied to it. Dread.

I don’t want to leave Kayden.

I’m not going to give up my plans for my future for him, but… I don’t want to leave him alone again.

“Briar? It’s okay. When you do grow up and leave, I won’t hold it against you. But I won’t forget you, either. It doesn’t matter how long I’m trapped here. I will never forget the most amazing person I’ve ever known.”

At the realization that I’ve spoken aloud, I hug Zena as close as she’ll allow me to, trying to calm my blush. “Kayden… Don’t promise something like that. You would resent me. I know it.”

“Don’t promise something like that,” Kayden echoes, smirking. “I could never, _ever_ resent you, Briar Delaney. I swear.”

I sigh. “I’m sorry… I can’t believe you.”

“Pinkie promise I won’t hate you and that you won’t stay in that terrible place because of me?” Kayden tries, holding out his right pinkie.

He looks so positive that this will convince me that he’s honest. He has the same amazing, encouraging smile directed at me.

“Really?”

“You can’t break a pinkie promise, Briar. Ever.”

Slowly, I find myself smiling at him. Even slower than the smile, I reach out and hook my pinkie with his. It doesn’t work very well, but the gesture is still nice. It still counts.

“I promise,” I whisper, more to myself than to Kayden.


End file.
